Forum:A Critique

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OKAYY.. i am a black women, and i hav e read this site over and this is just WRONG, you people have to realize that us people out there do make a difference. look at martin luther king, i dont see any of your lil white a$$'s doing what he did, and rosa parks? what about her? w e do make a difference and continue to. we dont wanna be tyreated like this and go on the internet and find that people like you are bad mouthing us. when we had notthing to do with you. sure maybe you have a problem with 1 OR 2 black people, but that doesnt give you the right to discrase the whole culture. SHAHEENA ALI —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Shaheena (talk • contribs)

If this is a joke, let me be the first to Lulz. If "Shaheena" is serious, I pray an admin locks this page before it turns into something awful. --Anyone 21:53, 9 January 2007 (UTC)

Or even Something Awful. --User:Nintendorulez 22:12, 9 January 2007 (UTC)

If you want to blame someone for Rosa Parks, go stab KP, because he was the one that didn't think my article was good enough for her. Eva Peron is where he thought it would fit better, but it really was for Rosa Parks (I wrote it the day she died because there was a lot of vandal article creation under the name, so I felt we should do something about it). » Brig Sir Dawg | t | v | c » 21:24, 17 January 2007 (UTC)

Please God, make the stupid people go away... Erm, anyway, be aware that Uncyclopedia is a parody site. Everything here is a joke. If you honestly get offended by any of our articles, quit taking things so seriously. And if you still have complains, go fuck yourself. --User:Nintendorulez 22:00, 9 January 2007 (UTC)

Also, get a goddamned spellchecker. You don't know how long it took me to try and make sense out of your incoherent garbage. Quit raping the English language. --User:Nintendorulez 22:01, 9 January 2007 (UTC)

/Rest of cast, "Oh, Nin!" --Anyone 22:07, 9 January 2007 (UTC)

My apologies, I let my intolerance get the better of me. I just can't stand illiterates. --User:Nintendorulez 22:10, 9 January 2007 (UTC)

I'm adding this to Uncyclopedia is the worst! --General Insineratehymn 22:27, 9 January 2007 (UTC)

Our contributors are of all colours, races, religions and nationalities. One of the things that makes this site work is the fact that most of our contributors are more than prepared to laugh at themselves. Hence, the Croatia article was written and heavily edited by Croatians, the Jew article by Jews, and so forth. You don't know what the fuck you're talking about love, so I suggest you take your misinformed stance out of here and wave your little protest banner at someone who gives a shit. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 02:33, 10 January 2007 (UTC)

Welcome Barbarian to Uncyclopedia. It is an article I am working on to give to new users such as yourself. I hope that it helps clear a few things up. It is currently hosted in my user page until I finish writing it and get it added to the articles we give to new users such as yourself. Please let me know if it has helped you or not. I am still open to suggestions in writing it. --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 21:42, 16 January 2007 (UTC)

Sir,

I am a Troll, that is, a large, "monstrous" creature indigenous to the steppe of Eurasia and to the wilderness of Iceland. Though we have a long, illustrious history, have made many achievements in the fields of haircare and pencil-hiding, and are eleven feet tall on average with powerful muscles and great big pointy teeth, we, as so many other minorities, are unjustly blamed for things which are not our responsibility.

Taking this forum as an example, I could cite you (had another correspondent not already done so) a long list of examples of why this site, as with all sites, represents all that is wrong with the world, which would be infinitely improved with the simple changes I have in mind: I refer you, Sir, to the practice known in colourful language as "Trolling".

I myself have never understood this term, nor as a child did I understand the idea that you humans seem to have of us toll-bridge terrorists, eating all those who come near. I live in an apartment in Reykjavik. My parents were born in Stockholm and led successful careers in management until they retired. I do not understand what it is about us that can be "verbed" to describe the practice of putting all one's narrow-minded and ill-considered ramblings into a semi-coherent stream of consciousness and posting it to a web page - my father, for example, was well-liked at his office and received a gold-effect watch on retiring, and was never thought less of by his coworkers. Indeed, he was the life and soul of the office Christmas party, understanding about office liaisons and bottom-photocopying, and even joined in himself on occasion by eating someone in the spirit of fun.

All things considered I do not see why, in this enlightened age, you (for it is only you who are responsible, ultimately, for the content of the site you manage) or indeed anyone, would use such a mindlessly derogative term and go unchecked. Only this morning as I took my break at work, I found a post on your site which at first confused me, and then appalled me: Sir, until lunchtime I did not even know what "grits" were, and now I find a harmless breakfast staple is not only being used worldwide as a sexual metaphor, but that this usage is commonly blamed on my people and our culture.

Certainly it is true that, over time, some Trolls have behaved irresponsibly, even eaten children, but we in general would never stoop so low as to harass any person by posting offensive, inflammatory or sexual remarks on a website. It is clearly all your fault - fix it, Sir, or face my moral judgment. Have you ever been eaten alive and rogered by an eleven-foot magical creature at the same time?

Yours in anticipation of a Final Solution,

Magnus Trollensen,

Reykjavik

Magnus, you are nothing but a troll. Myself, I am a one-eyed snotsucker with a wooden liver and face constant discrimination because I smell so bad. Complaints like Shaheena's are jess gettin' on my last nerve. DAMN! If Dave Chapelle still had his show he'd bitch-slap that girl for giving illiteracy a bad name. I mean, not all uneducated people are whiners.----OEJ 15:32, 11 January 2007 (UTC)

Established poll voting for reasons unknown

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For. • Spang • ☃ • talk • 00:30, 10 Jan 2007

Flurgnobgarflex --General Insineratehymn 01:33, 10 January 2007 (UTC)

Against -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 02:11, 10 January 2007 (UTC)

Neutral goshzillacorrespondence 02:14, 10 January 2007 (UTC)

• Nerm --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 03:52, 10 January 2007 (UTC)
• George Bush doesn't care about this forum post -- » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 03:58, 10 January 2007 (UTC)
• Forgainst renaming Uncyclopedia "Millennium Bridge" --Alksub - VFH CM WA RV {talk} 06:16, 10 January 2007 (UTC)
• Gronk!  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 11:03, 10 January 2007 (UTC)
• Jigga What? --Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 15:41, 11 January 2007 (UTC)
• Fnord --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 19:40, 11 January 2007 (UTC)
• Fo' Shizzl. --Crazyswordsman...With SAVINGS!!!! (T/C) 16:40, 15 January 2007 (UTC)
• Cs1987 Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 14:23, 17 January 2007 (UTC)

BENSON BUTTS IN

AS ONE BLACK PERSON TO ANOTHER (IT'S REALLY INVISIBLE METAL, BUT ACCORDING TO THE PICTURES OF ME, I'M BLACK), BENSON CHALLENGES YOU TO AN UNCYC FORUM BATTLE TO THE DEATH! BENSON HAS BEEN GONE FOR A MONTH, AND WOULD LIKE TO ADD SOME NEW NAMES TO THE LIST OF PEOPLE HE HAS BEATEN. powershot WAS THE LAST ONE ADDED, AND THAT WAS A MONTH AGO! PUNY MONKIES: ORGANIZE THIS GREAT BATTLE, AND BENSON WILL THEN FIGHT SHANEENIQUA. BENSON IS BETTER THAN YOU! Benson 21:59, 11 January 2007 (UTC)

BUT MY LORD, WHAT WOULD BE THE POINT? YOU ARE CLEARLY KING OF ALL THAT YOU SURVEY. I FEEL THIS WOULD BE A GRAVE MISUSE OF YOUR MAJESTIC AND MIGHTY POWER, EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE INFINITELY STRONG. I ALSO FEEL IT WOULD BE A WASTE OF YOUR TIME, EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE ETERNAL. I GUESS WHAT I'M SAYING IS AIM FOR THE BALLS. --Anyone 22:44, 11 January 2007 (UTC)

DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME FIGHTING THIS IDIOTIC NOOB. SHE NEVER POSTED SINCE THE ORIGINAL RANT BECAUSE WE TOTALLY TORE HER A NEW ONE, AND NOW THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL SHE'LL COME BACK NOW THAT YOU'VE CALLED HER OUT. PLUS HER MOTHER'S A WHORE. --User:Nintendorulez 23:07, 11 January 2007 (UTC)

THEREFORE, BENSON HAS ALREADY WON. HOLY CRAP SIR, THAT WAS FAST. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 23:26, 11 January 2007 (UTC)

Just a tad extreme there, wot? As you pointed out, she hasn't been back, and therefore isn't causing something awful. She had her say, Codeine gave her a polite, coherent answer, and she's not arguing the point. Why is everybody being so rude to her? Just sayin'. . .  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 23:33, 11 January 2007 (UTC)

Would somebody explain why everyone got banned here? --User:Nintendorulez 17:32, 15 January 2007 (UTC)

All caps in the Village Dump. Mea Culpa, Youa Culpa, now we all should get over it so Famine doesn't ban us for bitching. --The Acceptable  Cainad  (Fnord) 18:58, 15 January 2007 (UTC)

Vote to have any mentions of the characteristics, culture celebrities and stereotypes of african americans removed from uncyc to avoid the possibility of offending them

• Against. - whoopie goldberg 20:01, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
• Against. - M4rt1nLu7h3rK1ng 20:01, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
• Strong Against. - Morgan Freeman 20:01, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
• For. - JackMort 20:01, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
• Against. - That black guy from the disney thing 20:01, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
• Against. - Scatman Crothers 20:01, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
• For doing this with every single topic in the universe until there are no articles left. We don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, now, do we? --User:Nintendorulez 21:19, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
• Against - We are not Wikipedia so why should we care? --KWild 02:14, 17 January 2007 (UTC)
• What'chu talkin' 'bout, Willis? Gary Coleman 02:29, 17 January 2007 (UTC)
• Against --Toussaint L'ouverture 21:47, 17 January 2007 (UTC)