UnNews:TX governor to wall off NM

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Every time you think, you weaken the nation —Moe Howard UnNews Sunday, December 3, 2023, 21:09:59 (UTC)

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19 October 2023

Governor Abbott demonstrates to Texas lawmen his custom, mobile war-fighting console.

AUSTIN, Texas -- The U.S. state of Texas is set to wall off the U.S. state of New Mexico.

Governor Greg Abbott announced a new border wall to fence off the state. Abbott stated that existing fences on the Texas/Mexico border, plus an improbable northward turn in the Rio Grande, induce migrants to cross into neighboring New Mexico's Doña Ana County (named for a popular doughnut chain) and then move sideways into Texas.

However, insiders acquainted with Abbott stated on background that it is much more likely that he really believes New Mexico is a different country. The University of Texas here already demands that applicants from New Mexico apply as "foreign students". Abbott's belief would be further reinforced by the declaration last month of New Mexico Governor Michelle Latinx Grisham that the U.S. Constitution does not apply in parks and playgrounds in Albuquerque, several hours to the north.

The red circle shows the multi-state zone through which migrants from relatively colorless Juárez move to enter already-pretty-brown El Paso.

Why the Mexicans don't just stay in New Mexico is hotly debated. Although the pastries at Doña Ana are excellent, lack of Constitutional protections may bother them; also lack of jobs, and lack of the famous Texas hospitality, just step away from my daughter if you know what's good for you. Having swum across both the Rio Bravo and the Rio Grande (see map), many may want motels with ample extra towels by calling Reception, and El Paso's several Motel 6's are renowned for that.

Abbott stated, "To end that, we are building a barrier on the New Mexico border." Government being government, there are likely to be proposals for follow-on projects to the north and then east, as New Mexico nearly encircles El Paso and there is no telling how far the migrants might walk to evade a stretch of wall. Myriad other urban problems would also be solved by building an impassable barrier across the entire NM/TX boundary. Officials are also wrestling with whether it would be less unsightly to simply fence in the entirety of New Mexico rather than try to fence everything foreign out of Texas.

There would be openings in the wall every so often so that pedestrians could cross, register with Customs and Border Protection officials, get their toiletries emptied to look for drugs, and exchange their "money" (known as Pez) for the hardy Greenback.