Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/November 24

November 24: Pete Best's Birthday (US, UK)

• 1601 - Pilgrims celebrate the first Thanksgiving. Pete Best wonders why there is no Thanksgiving in the UK until he realizes that the English have nothing to give thanks for.
• 1859 - The great prophet Charles Darwin publishes his manifesto The Origin of Species, predicting the eventual birth of Pete Best.
• 1941 - Pete Best is kicked out of mother's womb.
• 1946 - Teacher sends note home to Best's parents, complaining about his sullenness and unwillingness to play bass with other children.
• 1951 - Mother auditions George Best as possible replacement in the family.
• 1955 - Best learns to play drums. Snares, bass and drumsticks go off and socialize with one another, leaving Best out.
• 1960 - Best makes trip to Germany; greeted with cries of "Rammstein forever, Pete Best never!"
• 1961 - Best drums for Tony Sheridan; burns Georgia with Phil Sheridan.
• 1962 - The Beatles record demo version of "Love Me Do;" original chorus of "We hate our fucking drummer" goes unnoticed.
• 1962 - George Harrison stares icily at Best during a performance; Paul McCartney kicks his drum set during rehearsal; John Lennon hires Brian Epstein solely to fire Best.
• 1962 - Best kicked out of the Beatles.
• 1964 - Best kicked out of England; Elizabeth II says her kingdom "wants to go in a new direction."
• 1968 - Best briefly kicked back into Beatles when Ringo leaves during White Album sessions; quits when he realizes he'll lose his job a second time to a guy named "Ringo."
• 1971 - Alice Cooper jumps from a plane and disappears, after collecting a ransom which includes US$200,000 and a Pete Best box set.
• 1984 - Fozzie Bear tragically dies of a heart-attack. His mother blames Pete Best.
• 1993 - David Dickinson makes headline news after cutting off negotiations to be in the Doom video game.
• 1995 - Release of Beatles Anthology allows new generation of fans to kick Pete Best around.
• 2000 - Pete Best briefly dies for 4 minutes before coming to life thanks to magic.
• 2012 - Best celebrates 50th anniversary of Love Me Do release. He is smuggled into and out of the party by Ringo, who has Best hide in the boot of his limo. Ringo forgets to let Best out until 2014.