Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/March 30

March 30: National Cleavage Day (UK)

• 1599 - Elizabeth I of England establishes 'The Itty Bitty Titty Committee'.
• 1910 - Broadcaster Terry Wogan is born under a credenza and is raised in seclusion by Hypnotoad.
• 1996 - The KGB begins recruiting fat chicks with thongs as secret agents.
• 1939 - Hitler announces a glorious 1000 year Reich free of saggy tits .
• 1954 - The first Subway sandwich shop in Canada opens in Atlanta.
• 1968 - She wore an itsy, bitsy, teeny, weeny, yellow polka-dot bikini.
• 1977 - Harry Potter discovers the Swedish mammoth tit ('Potterus gigantatittium).
• 1981 - The animated rock video Heavy Metal is released. Holy shit!
• 1990 - Canadian Uncyclopedian gets to second base; parents proud.
• 1996 - Fox News opens its comment line but finds its core audience is unable to dial phones or remember strings of numbers.
• 2003 - Pamela Anderson is the grand marshal in the Macy's National Cleavage Day Parade.
• 2007 - Vention, The National Kiwanis Convention for the New England District, meets. Nine months later, every teenage girl in the New England district is still hung-over and going into labor.
• 2008 - Chavette Katie Price reveals her supervillain identity Jordan, who then proceeds to inflate her breasts to engulf London, killing over 25,000.
• 2045 - Feminists attempt to outlaw the production of low-cut shirts. They are then all killed by the mob of women running across town to buy the last few v-neck shirts made.