UnNews:Horse bites off man's testicle

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Horses - you never know what they're thinking.

Fake News that's honestly fake UnNews Sunday, December 22, 2024, 01:26:59 (UTC)

Horse bites off man's testicle UnNews Logo Potato.png

12 March 2009

SULAWESI, Indonesia -- A 35-year-old construction worker is recovering after one of his testicles was bitten off by a horse yesterday. The man was shoveling sand off a cart at a building site in the village near capital city Jakarta when the animal appeared to suddenly turn wild, lunged at him and sank its teeth into his nether regions.

Shocked witnesses say the animal, belonging to a local man, has been known to attack people in the past. Their quick thinking saved the man, who could have bled to death, and they bundled him into a car and rushed him to the nearest hospital for emergency surgery. "Luckily the horse didn't chew it up too much or eat the testicle," one bystander was quoted as saying. "I picked it up and took it to the doctor that was treating him in the hope that they might be able to re-attach it."

The victim, a devout Hindu, said that he believes the horse may be the reincarnated spirit of his dead wife. "She never swallowed, either," he explained.

Sources[edit]