Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/Press Room/21

A very thoughtful message by PopGoesTheWeasel

A very thoughtful piece of art written by PopGoesTheWeasel

By PopGoesTheWeasel

Ladies and gentlemen, my morbid fascination with the VFH and the votes there has led me to speak, with great injustice in my eyes and pain pounding in my chest! I have to say this. It is to my observation and I have failed to see the moral behind this. I need to speak. The generation requires this. For it has been known from the age of moral, the time has come. We are in one of the most vulnerable positions I have ever known since I have stepped into the Uncyclopedia community.

The rise and fall of what has been so conceived to be important has now failed to even reach the toes of men. We require the essentials. We require what has never been spoken of. We need ...

penis

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHhadgqhbgfqwqf

LOL

No, but seriously. VFH needs more votes. I don't care if it has been highlighted to many times but seriously! Come back and admire the articles! Stop masturbating and come back! We need you!

We need ... enlightenment.

--POP!GoesTheWeasel 09:36, October 25, 2012 (UTC)

I will certainly consider adding this drivel at an appropriate time. And place. You just wait. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Dec 7 '12 8:58 (UTC)

I'll

work on this week's Unsignpost if need be. --Revolutionary, Anti-Bensonist, and TYATU Boss Uncyclopedian Meganew (Chat) (Care for a peek at my work?) (SUCK IT, FROGGY!) 03:39, November 21, 2012 (UTC)

Whoops, didn't see yer comment here! I'll let you know if I need any help. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Dec 7 '12 8:54 (UTC)

Kk, BB. --Revolutionary, Anti-Bensonist, and TYATU Boss Uncyclopedian Meganew (Chat) (Care for a peek at my work?) (SUCK IT, FROGGY!) 17:38, December 7, 2012 (UTC)

A Message from the Sponsors

Good to see that someone/some people have revived UnSignpost. It's a lively read. I have stopped looking at the New York Times and the Daily Mail since your publication sprang back to life. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:16, December 12, 2012 (UTC)

Glad to hear it. You're welcome. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Wed, Dec 12 '12 16:34 (UTC)

I trust you will cover the recent influx of excellent new writers to this site. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 22:29, December 16, 2012 (UTC)

Maybe. Would you like to write a piece on 'em? ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, Dec 17 '12 13:35 (UTC)

I know...I do so little around here...ok..when's the deadline? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 15:06, December 17, 2012 (UTC)

Any time before Wednesday morning U.S. time. I would do it, but I'm setting up a mail server, and by "setting up", I mean "failing miserably at setting up". ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, Dec 17 '12 15:15 (UTC)

OK...but where would I post it? I haven't contributed to UnSignpost before. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 15:18, December 17, 2012 (UTC)

Userspace or here, doesn't matter. If you put it in your userspace, link here and I'll take care of the rest! ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, Dec 17 '12 16:00 (UTC)

See below. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 09:14, December 19, 2012 (UTC)

Outbreak of Noobery

How often has someone started a forum 'We're Doomed' or 'Where Domed?' and other variations or the announcement 'this website has moved away from my idea of what is funny!' So what we can do here but celebrate a clutch of new fully fledged contributors who arrived on our shores, all fresh and well scrubbed! In recent months we had Leverage produce articles faster than bindweed and now he has joined by the likes of MagicBus (an admirer of The Who] or a kaftan nostalgic?), news hound Bill Melater and the ferocious Fakehater who will rip your arms off if he detects you're a phoney. Then there is Murder_Frog who swears blind he is unrelated to another amphibian. Evidently the lily pond is big enough for two croakers. Another newbie who is currenly taking a keen interest in Singapore is CDPCCNAC. What the name means, I have no idea but perhaps he is wise to leave so few clues about his true identity. Then there is our own Mr Tambourine Man, Equilateralperil. Moving closer to the ground look for literary earthworms in his search for Sonic the Hedgehog related stories is Igotnothing whilst from the land of Sean Connery is Dannyboy1209. A noob with ambition, Danny has already asked to become an admin and has nominated himself for everything. With an attitude like that, this one is going places (here, there or everywhere). Who will become the Noobs of Noobs and win something to stick on their bedroom door. The jury is out and so am I tonight. So go ahead, check these fledglings out here.

--RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 23:46, December 18, 2012 (UTC)

No, we ARE doomed. Unless we exodus.--fcukmanLOOS3R! 09:05, December 19, 2012 (UTC)

Regarding the Accusation of Navelism in UnNews

In recent days, several editors have asserted that there has been a rise in navelism in UnNews. However, I only created 4 pregnancy-related unNews articles since I returned 4 days ago. One of those was more about abortion than pregnancy per say, while the other was about unpregnancy fetishism. Therefore, I only wrote two unNews articles about pregnancy proper, and since the other two were about nonpregnancy and abortion, they should count as negative. By that method of counting, I wrote a net total of zero pregnancy-related unNews articles since my recent return. An accusation of navelism over 0 articles seems unfounded.

Navelism, in case you are unaware, is the starring at the navels for the purposes of sexual arousal. It is often associated with pregnancy fetish, but can mean any sort of belly or belly-button centered fetishism. I believe these accusations of navelism are generated merely out of jealously. Wikia has removed most of the images of nude breasts, while pregnant bellies have remained unaffected. The result of this is that "normal" people can no longer look at tits on Unfree Uncyclopedia, yet pregofiles can still look at pregnant bellies, and particularly pregnant navels, with utter impunity. I hope my fellow editors can move beyond such immature jealously and focus on more important issues, like writing unNews articles about the recent exodus from Wikia.

Because Socky accused me of navelism or something. --Mn-z 18:01, January 10, 2013 (UTC)

You plan to create your own website just for this er...interest Mnbvcxz? I know someone had a 'whipping wiki' but I think they are one of the departed. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 18:01, January 17, 2013 (UTC)

Since I made a full-on unNews article about this, I should probably withdraw this from Unsignpost. --Mn-z 19:16, January 17, 2013 (UTC)

Seriously, that's it? Your kind likes to look at huge elongated belly buttons? I never knew that. Impressive, actually. Are there many of your type around? Clubs? Conventions? Damn, if I were pregnant I'd know where to go to make some money if all you want to do is look. Very interesting (seriously). Is there a wikipedia page on this? ("preggofiles" doesn't come up with any related data) Thanks. On the unnews issue, it seems fine to write on this topic if that's what a user cares about, but maybe not too many on the main page?Aleister 3:58 17-1-'13

UnSignpost article(both sites): the Cold War update

The Cold War Update

by Meganew

Well, ladies and gentlemen... It has begun. For those of you who don't know, the great internet humor wiki known across the world as Uncyclopedia has officially split. While there are those who remain loyal to the original(now Wikia-owned) Uncyc, others have left and formulated a site of their own, "Free Uncyclopedia," if you will. Every Saturday, starting this week, I will give an update at User:Meganew/Uncyc Cold War on the current situation, sharing details with the populaces of both sites on any updates pertaining to the current split. Post on that page's talk page if you wish to give your input as a Wikia Uncycer or a Free Uncycer.

Some of you may wish to know how this started... It all goes back a very long time ago, when a man named Chronarion sold the original Uncyclopedia(uncyclopedia.org) to Wikia, the company originally created by Jimbo Wales as a hub of wikis for various specific subjects. Over the years, Wikia did a great many things to Uncyclopedia, including domain name updates, restrictions on hardline levels of satire, and most notable of all, the censoring of all unclad racks on the entire site. The final spark was(according to Frosty, one of the Free Uncyc leaders, a heavy demand over adding a North America-only suicide prevention hotline to the suicide page. Regardless of the circumstances, members were tired of Wikia, and as such left the site to formulate their own variant.

A primary difficulty for years was the fact that there was no original domain name that a new Uncyclopedia could be built on. Uncyclopedia.org was in Wikia's hands, after all. Incapable of simply leaving, a domain name ([en.uncyclopedia.co]) was eventually found, and the move was made by the majority of writers and the like. The inevitable struggle between these two wikis will prove to be most interesting to watch as it plays out.

Until next week, keep on trucking!

Meganew, Reporter

New issues

Why has it been so long since the last new issue? When will a new one be produced? Dannyboy1209 (talk) 17:21, March 15, 2013 (UTC)

I've started one for April. Look on the main UnSignpost page. Please add to it. Sir ScottPat UnS CUN VFH (talk) 19:56, April 8, 2013 (UTC)