UnNews:Rivers Cuomo takes on Spotify

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1 February 2022

Cuomo takes over the music industry.

STOCKHOLM, Sweden -- Instead of following in the steps of Neil Young or Joni Mitchell, rock band Weezer's frontman, Rivers Cuomo, has launched his own streaming competitor, to be named Weezify.

Aiming to become the self-titled "King of Music", Rivers Cuomo's music platform will do the exact same thing as its rival Spotify, except only play music from the Weezer discography. After the heavy backlash Spotify received last week with "famous" musicians Young and Mitchell pulling their music off the platform, Rivers adds even more pressure on the green music-streaming giant by making a site that will only be visited by the 10 million or so Weezer fans. Despite having a platform for only Weezer songs, Rivers has allowed Spotify to continue holding both Weezer's catalogue, as well as his own solo material, which includes a Dr. Seuss Netflix song. Leaving his work on Spotify suggests that he probably aligns with Joe Rogan and may be an anti-vaxxer, or he just wants a stable source of income.

The relatively new Weezify site was entirely coded by Rivers himself while also recording four new Weezer albums in 2022. Such of the vast audience as can actually log in are estimated at 30–45 persons, but a million more are well on the way to join the Spotify competitor. Weezer fans have celebrated the launch of a platform just for them, with some going as far as to lose their virginity for the second time.

Paul McCartney announced that he intends to create another music-streaming site solely for Beatles songs, with talk radio features covering bandmate John Lennon's legacy of spousal abuse, called Beatify.

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