UnNews:Billionaires race to be first in space

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Where man always bites dog UnNews Monday, September 27, 2021, 01:29:59 (UTC)

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19 June 2021

The Ego has Landed.

MIAMI, Florida -- The race to be the first mega-rich man in space is about to start. Already on the launchpad and declaring he is ready to go is Jeff Bezos, the owner of Amazon and the richest man on the planet. In direct competition to him is Elon Musk and his plan to rocket into an orbit around earth this July.

Bezos looks set to win this race, as he has already undergone training and will co-pilot the Blue Ego Origin into space in the next month or so. He is going up with his brother Mark. However, Musk claims he will be ready "very soon" and will be hoping the Bezos brothers' mission will get delayed as Amazon misplaces packages with the vital parts to complete their rocket.

The Bezos vs. Musk fight has encouraged other billionaires to enter the race. This could mean that, in the future, the orbit around earth will be littered with discarded boxes and broken-down Teslas, among other objects.

A spokesperson from NASA said, "We welcome the competition. In the original Space Race, we were up against the Soviet Union and thought they beat us with the first man in space, but we landed our boys on the Moon. So, sucks to be you, Ivan! Now that Bezos and Musk are challenging us, we will improve our technology to be the best and will beat the Chinese in the same way we beat the Russians before."

So far, the Bezos brothers look the most likely to win the race to an orbit around Earth. But the next step will be to see if either them or Musk get to the Moon next.