Rock and Roll Hall of Shame
The Rock and Roll hall of shame is an organization of questionable legitimacy, which seeks to recognize the very worst in music with induction. It is generally not considered to be a compliment to be inducted.
History[edit]
The Rock bla bla kaka poo poo and Roll Hall of porn was actually founded in 1967 by America's favorite dirty old man, Bob Dylan. Legend has it that Dylan created the Hall of porn to put down his peers who he saw as inferior and to get back at John Elton, who never invited him to his birthday party. At first, the inductees were notified that they had won an achievement award and that the ceremony would be broadcast on national television. However, when they arrived, all they got was a punch in the face in front of a national audience. God, that Bob Dylan was a mean guy. I heard that as a kid, he used to pull the seat out from Joni Mitchell in art class....... Anyway, after the other musicians caught on, Dylan was forced to simply leave a flaming bag of dog shit on their doorsteps. I'm telling you, that Bob Dylan was one mean bastard. He also resorted to writing insulting songs about the performers he hated, as shown in this immortal verse aimed at notorious sissy James Taylor:
- "She takes just like a woman,
- She makes love just like a woman,
- And then she aches just like a woman,
- But she's a breakfast cereal!"
Going Too Far[edit]
Dylan eventually made the mistake of inducting Neil Diamond into the Hall of Shame. Diamond surprised Dylan by showing up on time for the ceremony. Neil Diamond was just itching for a fight- he always enjoyed a good one and was of course a member of his local fight club. Well, needless to say, a Jew won.
Axl Rose[edit]
In 1993 Dylan inducted Axl Rose into the Hall of Shame. The induction ceremony has yet to be held, though sources close to Rose say that it will coincide with the triumph of Democracy in the land of China. Rose later sued for the rights to the Rock and Roll Hall of Shame, which was TOTALLY his idea. Axl briefly kicked out all other inductees, replacing them with Howard "Buckethead" Stern, Trent Reznor's girlfriend Robin Finck, and other anonymous musicians. However, due to a bout with Botox parallyssis, Rose was unable to sign to sign to forms verifying this transaction, and control of the Hall was returned to Dylan.
Legal Troubles[edit]
In 2004, Dylan inducted Lars Ulrich into the Hall of Shame. This move proved disastrous, and Dylan spent the next 20 years in prison on charges of file sharing, due to a minor clerical error.
Emo[edit]
After the 2005 Warped Tour, the Hall of Shame Deciders, which includes the ghosts of Mark Lamarr and Jimi Hendrix, held a mass induction for all emo bands in existence. Except for several teenage girls, the decision was regarded as an overwhelming success.
U2 considered[edit]
U2 was considered for this Hall of Shame stuff but they dropped out to be "not having found what they were looking for". It still baffles Rockashamers to this day. Some have presumed that song "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" on their album "The Joshua Tree" has something to do with their disappearance. Most presume it doesn't have anything to do with that at all, whatsoever. Still, the mystery stands today.