UnNews:Indian bullet train to go undersea

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21 April 2016

An engineering schematic of the "bullet" train.

NEW DELHI, India -- Passengers will get the thrill of riding under the sea while riding the proposed Bullet Train between Mumbai and Ahmedabad.

Of the 508km journey, 21km will be under the sea, said a senior railway ministry official involved with the ambitious project. While most of the high-speed corridor is an elevated track, there will be a stretch after Thane Creek towards Virar on which the elevation is negative.

Although the country has shown it cannot operate a paddle-wheel ferry without having it roll over and drown all the passengers about once a year, the official assured the public that there is no danger from this thrilling submerged section between the two financial centers.

Signage will be clear that all passengers should close and lock their windows before the train descends under water, and train conductors will be trained to remind passengers who complain that the day is particularly hot or that their companions stink.

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The bullet train is designed to run at a maximum 350 km/hr and an operating speed of 320 km/hr, though when operating underwater, it will slow to about 15 knots, depending on the direction of the tides. Travellers will also be asked to temporarily extinguish smoking materials until the train surfaces and fresh air is available. However, the Railway Ministry has not yet completed procedures to deal with any cases of seasickness.

Japan will supply rolling stock, signals, and the power system, and one never hears about disasters in that country, unless radioactivity is involved or an emperor gets an itch for more territory. Funding for the project will also come from Japan, in the form of a 50-year loan paying interest at 0.1%, and no interest at all for the first fifteen years. The official assured his audience that nothing can go wrong with this part of the plan either.

A reporter suggested that it sounds as though Japan is paying India to accept ancient Bullet Trains, but the official claimed he heard the conductor's whistle just then and it was time to get on board.