UnNews:Bush Blames Saddam for Iraq Instability

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A newsstand that's brimming with issues ✪ UnNews ✪ Thursday, November 21, 2024, 18:49:59 (UTC)
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29 March 2006

Bush jives more nonsense, in a not too convincing posture

In attempt to proverbially 'pass the buck', President Bush announced earlier today that the reason for the instability of iRaq was not due to US occupation, but in fact the direct fault of Saddam Hussein. Bush cited that the detainment of Hussein was no excuse for not being able to keep the country in check, also stating that the budget deficit was the doing of evil communists plotting inside the nation, and not the fault of the Bush Administration as had been previously thought.

Bush vehemently denied that the capture of Saddam, and the subsequent liberation of iRaq gave Carte Blanché to terrorist insurgents, claiming that Saddam was merely using his dictatorship powers to disguise the goings on in iRaq, which Bush claims; "were the same then as they are now".

Bush also delivered a clear message, highlighting exactly why the country was in its current meltdown state; "Saddam was supposed to go in to hiding; he was... supposed to maintain a control of the insurgents - the worst thing he did was give himself up to our forces and release control of the iRaqi militants".

Upon hearing the news, many political figures were unavailable for comment after a large majority of politicians suffered a spastic seizure midway through the speech, and required hospitalization.

Bush has however announced that the US will remain committed to completely freeing the iRaqi people, although many interpreted that Bush may have hinted at the possibility of carpet bombing the entire land-mass if the terrorism continues, stating - "should the terrorism continue, the iRaqi people may be called upon to make the ultimate sacrifice".

Some have likened the iRaq war to cleaning a toilet made out of feces, making the association that the cleaning will never be complete until the toilet has gone.

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