Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/November 28

November 28: Panic Day, Tell Someone You Know You Had Sex With Someone They Don't Know Day

• c.5200 BCE - The Sumerian king imposes taxes, to be paid by this day. The people become hysterical as the day approaches with many shitting themselves. Dry cleaners are quickly invented.
• 1211 BCE - Egypt experiences ten plagues due to the wrath of God. Egyptians react to each one in terror and panic, except for the plague of funny-tasting catsup in little packages.
• 1883 - The massive eruption of Krakatoa volcano leaves thousands frustrated as they did not have time to panic before being wiped off the face of the Earth.
• 1908 - You're WHAT??!!?!?
• 1954 - Godzilla attacks and millions become hysterical as the smell of rubber and sweat is overwhelming.
• 1967 - Holy Shit! Anna Nicole Smith!!!!
• 1979 - Don't Panic.
• 2000 - Y2K kills the entire planet, annoying environmentalists throughout the planet. Users of Macs are left unharmed and hail Steve Jobs as the antichrist as if he wasn't already that.
• 2004 - Y2K is fixed by a patch from Microsoft, life returns to normal.
• 2004 - Y2K is fixed again by another patch from Microsoft, due to the complete failure of the first patch.
• 2005 - The 113th annual World Autofellatio Championship contest begins. If you have children, panic.
• 2006 - OMG! Celine Dion is in concert!!!!!! Nooooooooooooooooooo!!
• 2006 - Christopher Meloni attacks Emmy winner Jon Stewart after being screwed once again.
• 2008 - Kernel Panic: Segmentation Fault. (Core Dumped).
• 2012 - Scientists apologize for any inconvenience previous apocalypse warnings may have caused. They announce the apocalypse will happen 2 years from now.