Vice versa
“I really mean the opposite of what I'm saying. But of course, if I say that, does it mean what I said? Or do I mean what I said I said? OR DID I JUST BLOW YOUR FUCKIN' MIND!??!”
“You come on Baby. I cooka da food for you, I poura da wino, and then we recite vice versa, as we maka da love.”
Vice versa is the theory that all things are the exact opposite of how they appear. (Except, of course, this theory. And that sentence. And vice versa).
Origins[edit]
The term Vice versa, as it is often used, means that in the particular area, it is acknowledged that the opposite is actually the truth.
For example, Oranges are orange and vice versa means that oranges are orange, and orange is also orange.
Without use of Vice versa, you would be stuck in a logic trap, not knowing if orange actually was orange or if oranges actually were orange if orange was actually oranges.[gesundheit!]
In order to avoid this festering quagmire of utter confusion, Vice versa is commonly used.
Another example: the term 'Vice versa' is the opposite of Asrev Eciv, the scientist credited with discovering this Universal Truth. Without use of the term Vice versa to mean the name, you would be stuck in a logical trap, wondering if his true name was 'Vice Versa', 'Verse Visa', 'Asrev Eciv' or "Asiv Esrev" (His twin brother, oddly enough.).
It's the the single most complex theory in the domain of human thought, harder than string theory, quantum cheddardynamics and general relativity put together.
It is totally incomphrehensible to all but the most talented minds and most talented liars. Of course they don't understand it either, but they understand that they don't understand it, which is the same as understanding it. Understand? Or don't you?
Its only tenet is that all things are the exact opposite of how they really are. Even the theory itself.
It has been verified by every single scientific theory every conducted. The fact that they provide no evidence of its existence is the most compelling evidence of its existence one could imagine existing. Or not existing.
The basic proof of the theory is this: there is no evidence the theory is true, it absolutely has to be true.
Everything else follows from this.
Examples[edit]
Examples abound. When you apply the theory to real life, you see how much sense it makes. Or, more accuately, doesn't make:
The earth is round, but it doesn't appear round. How can this be? Obviously, because the earth is supposed to be round, it isn't, and thus you are able to walk on it without falling off.
Time progesses forward, but it doesn't seem like it. How can this be? Obviously the fact that that you don't think time progresses forward means it obviously does.
I exist. You think you exist, but when you apply the theory, you see that you don't actually exist. If you did, the theory would be wrong, and theory is right, so you must not exist. Impeccible logic. (Does that mean sex doesn't exist either?!?)
You're actually reading this. You think you're reading this, but you aren't. When you apply the theory, you realize that if actually read this you'd understand the theory, and since you do understand the theory, you can't have actually read the article.
Criticism[edit]
A number of people say that the theory makes no sense, has no evidence supporting and can be proven to be false using the most simple of logical examples.
They fail to realize that the fact that it appears that it makes no sense, appears to have no supporting evidence and appears to be false means that is in, in fact, correct.
Others have brought up the fact that if the theory were actually true, it would also have to be false.
This is also not true, because if the theory actually were true, it would be false, and we know that this is not the case, as simple evidence proves the theory is true (That is, false).
Other naysayers point at the fact that the theory is totally asinine. To those who truly understand the theory, this is laughable argument for obvious reasons.
Still others fail to understand the Grand Theory and its wonderful applications. They dismiss outright, to their own peril.
Conclusion[edit]
Vice versa is the most useful theory humanity has created or vice versa.