Great American novel
The Great American novel has been the Holy Grail of literary development in the United States since Colonial days. Experts have always thought that, given America's linguistic innovation, it was only a matter of time before the nation produced quality fiction.
The classic was created, on March 9, 2005 by a Dr. Johnston, given name unknown, on this very website. Its original title was the thought-provoking: Cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit.
Status
The novel is featured on the Uncyclopedia:About page. Thanks to the Creative Commons agreement, the entire text of the novel — awesome in its brevity — can be reproduced here, and the reader is free to use it, fully or in part, whenever appropriate in everyday life. This is felicitous, as every attempt to contact the genius Dr. Johnston has failed, and Wikia representatives asked to identify him via checkuser in order to give him his just dues have replied that we should file a formal request at Special:Contact instead.
The novel's entire text
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Cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap john wood crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit semprini. Cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap friend shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit Belgium cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit. Honestly, what were you expecting? An extra cunt for good measure, you cunt? |
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Literary analysis
The anonymous author of the above statement shows clear Joycean influences, especially in his intelligent use of the 'stream of consciousness', a device whereby the author foregoes the use of traditional storytelling, punctuation, and coherence to attempt to indicate to the audience a greater truth. This shows the audience exactly what is in the character's mind, and is particularly applicable in the above case, where it becomes clear that the author is, in an ironically literal sense, full of shit.
There are also hidden messages in his work, in a similar way to Shakespeare's famous 'secret insult', whereby the first letters of the names of all the main characters in his plays, put together, make up the phrase, "MARLOWE DOTH BE GAY." The subtext for Cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit may be difficult to glean for the casual viewer, but for anyone with an associate degree in literature, the writing is not simply made up of the phrase, "cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit." One can posit that the semantic linking of "cunt cunt cunt cunt" and "crap crap shit," is a thoroughly symbolic comment on the inescapable path from life until death. "Indubitably, we all emerged from the cunt," says DeVry professor Irving Washington in his two hundred and page treatise on the subject, "and unto crap crap shit we all shall fall."
Notice also how the word "crap" is repeated multiple times throughout this text. Washington continues: "once, surely, would be enough? That would have got the point across so the page could return to, say, repeating the word 'cunt' again.". This, however, overlooks one important detail. There is a lot of crap on this page. And repeating the word 'crap' is a cue for the reader to be sub-consciously reminded just how much shit there actually is on this page. The sheer repetition of the words—twice for "crap" and quatrice for "cunt"—raises further questions about the nature of repetition itself; is there any significance that there are four "cunt"s and only two "crap"s, let alone one "shit"? This train of thought has been a dead end for deep readers, leading most critics to grudgingly accept an underlying dadaist metaphor for the inherent ridiculousness of the living.