Etc

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
(Redirected from Et cetera)
Jump to navigation Jump to search

“Etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc... and etc...”

~ Oscar Wilde

Etc is short-hand for "Et ceteretera" - an ancient Persian expression. Literally translated as "loose mind", it means "and some others that I can't remember".

For example:

“I killed the last dinosaur by attaching rocks, pebbles and leaves etc to a stick and beating that mofo over the head”

~ Cro-Magnon man on Extinction

Here 'etc' is used to signify that other objects were attached to the stick, but that they could not think what they were, most likely because he was lying.

What is Et Cetera?[edit]

Et Cetera is everything. Everything that isn't. But you wouldn't know because it's elusive.

Very elusive. Like this robot guy.

Can anyone find Et Cetera? And what the hell is that robot guy?[edit]

In -3 BJ, Elvis came upon it before he reached Nirvana. Roswell was a dud, duh! It was an ascenscion to Heaven. Which et cetera knows. Et cetera, however, killed Elvis, and made Elvis one of the only victims to die by the hands of et cetera. For those of you idiots, the people who died in Roswell by the hands of God were Tupac, Nietzche, Hamlet, Hitler, and Frankenstein. Not surprisingly, the lord of the Sheep also died, but since God was pissed, God struck et cetera with a lightning bolt. Not surprisingly, Robot Guy (shown above) ate the lightning bolt. In return, et cetera threw Jebus at God, which shattered God's bank of noodles and killed God. Alas, not even the Almighty can find et cetera. Much less kill it.

That Robot Guy is et cetera's personal minion. Who looks pretty cool.

Down with Et Cetera! Et Cetera killed God.[edit]

Not quite, buddy. That robot guy can do some crazy crap.

It can morph. Quite well.

Forms of the Robot Guy[edit]

-Dirty Harry Monkey (as shown)

-Beer

-An army of tenth-degree ninjas

-A laxative nuclear bomb

-Zorro

-Mr. Roboto

-Mr. T.

-Et cetera himself!

What does et cetera look like?[edit]

Nobody knows. Yul Brynner?? maybe?? Something?? etc.

But we think it looks like this.

Ways to avoid et cetera for saving of self[edit]

Run.

Jump.

Flee.

Swim.

Fly.

Go live in a hole.

Die.

Face him.

Do something, and let nothing pass you by. Because it might just be, et cetera!

Etc. Oops.

Ways to avoid the Robot Guy[edit]

According to recent evidence, scientists say that James Bond has been hunting the Robot Guy

Yes, you did.

since 70 AJ, but who can believe scientists? They're kind of like weathermen. Everyone believes them because they got tons of degrees from college, but they're really wrong. A lot.

Anyway, you saw James Bond hunting the Robot Guy. You told me when I was killing pigs in North Africa to make fried bacon. I quickly responded to the scene and ran like mad, because I cannot beat the Robot Guy. Anyway, during James Bond's attempts, Robot Guy was wounded by electric taser seven times, but quickly responded via peas cannons set up in the castle where they had met. In North Africa.

If you really want to avoid the Robot Guy, do nothing ever. Because Robot Guy is everything when he wants to be. And you are certainly not James Bond. So don't try it. But....

The story of James Bond in regard to the et cetera behemoth[edit]

Once Jimmy Bo-Shizzle got seriously peas-pwned, Robot Guy captured him and brought him to Etc. After months and months of slave work on the plantation as sentenced by the Grand Oblivion Court, Christmas finally came around, with Danny Craig sliding down the chimney that night, as Santa was buying out whore-houses for entertainment purposes. However, Etc captured Craig as well, but Craig, too genius to fall completely to the hands of Etc, merged with James Bond, expelling Pierce Brosnan. Since Etc has no eyes, however, he couldn't really tell the difference, so Piggy Brother died at the stake.

Suddenly, however, James Bond was called out of Etc by Casino Royale, and et cetera was crippled. It had never lost a subject before on such short timing. To this day, et cetera is planning to draw James Bond back into its lair.

You can barely see it. Because it would exist if everything else didn't exist. But it doesn't exist. Or so you think.

See also[edit]