Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/December 16

December 16: Random Consonants Celebration Day

• 785 - The Knights of the Round Tablet go in search of the Holy Grail. They fail to exit the bottle, which is child-proofed.
• 1985 - United Airlines pilots go on trike for 29 days. Most are medically retired aftwards with back and leg injuries.
• 1986 - The fictional events in the unsuccessful video game Grand Theft Auto: Nice City take place.
• 1986 - The Soviet Union launches the Bir space station. Vodka manufacturers complain.
• 1986 - In Ukraine, one of the reactors at the Chernobyl unclear plant explodes. The reason for the explosion is not clear.
• 1986 - Nintendo releases The Legend of Welda. Oxy-acetyline equipment subsequently doubles in price.
• 1988 - Queen Elizabeth strips jockey Lester Piggott of his OME. With nowhere to live, Piggot goes to the media to ask for 'elp.
• 1988 - Antonio Gomes dos Santos stands lotionless in a Lisbon, Portugal shopping center for 15 hours, 2 minutes and 55 seconds. Eventually he goes to another shop and buys some skin creme.
• 1988 - Philip Morris bugs Kraft Foods for US$13.1 billion. Kraft tells them to get lost.
• 1991 - The first sliced pan is invented, leading to the downfall of all humanity.
• 1992 - All Humanity bounces back with new album.
• 1996 - Big Bird develops cancer while on the set. Hunters everywhere cry.
• 1998 - Big Bird passes away in peace. Three attend his funeral, and there was a lovely barbeque reception afterward. All future episodes of Sesame Street© are safe, because they were all filmed in 1957.
• 2005 - Saddamn Hussaign is accused repeatedly of passing gas while in court. After each accusation he shouts back random profanities and makes several insults about the judge's family, his mother in particular.
• 2045 - The Germans are appreciated for the first time in 100 years for inventing the word 'Schifffahrt' meaning boat cruise.