Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/July 16

July 16: International Turning Japanese Day (America, 1980s)

• 1812 - Neils Bohr lays out the first Table of the Elements, containing less than half of the elements known today, but including most of the important ones such as Linoleum and Kryptonite.
• 1862 - American Civil War: David Farragut becomes the first United States Navy rear admiral, becoming the butt end of 'rear admiral' jokes for decades.
• 1945 - The Age of Large, Mutated Reptiles begins (pictured) when the United States successfully detonates a nuclear weapon, unleashing gigantic horrors upon the world (mostly Japan).
• 1972 - The Time Cubicle Theory is first developed. The lead theorist was certainly not on any sort of brutally mind-bending narcotics.
• 1980 - The Vapors release their song Turning Japanese which piques the world's attention. This would cause over 50 countries to try to invade China.
• 1984 - Americans misunderstand the concept of hentai and start doing perverted bondage acts with chickens.
• 1994 - Disney releases the animated movie The Lion King despite accusations of plagiarism of the Japanese animated movie Emperor Lion/ Kimba the White Lion. Disney lawyers assert that Lion King is about a young lion whose parents are killed and is advised by a baboon, while Emperor/ Kimba is about a young lion whose parents are killed and is advised by a baboon.
• 1994 - Comet Shoemaker-Levy 9 collides with Jupiter and is sentenced to twenty space-years of probation for reckless endangerment and orbiting without a license.
• 2002 - My dissertation on Modern Advances in Mathematical Theory suitably impresses the brunette in the fifth row, and we retire to the library for a cozy study session and a quick bout of intercourse.
• 2012 - Lionsgate releases the dystopian movie Hunger Games despite charges of plagiarism of the Japanese dystopian movie Battle Royale (2000). US film industry lawyers note that Hunger Games is about a violent last-man-standing competition between students while Battle Royale is about the same thing, pretty much, with an identical plot, except US judges haven't seen the latter film and are pretty much a bunch of racists anyway.