UnNews:Sub-Genius strikes this journalist as disingenuous

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11 June 2010

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This column is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-eyeblink misinformation. And by "misinformation", we mean "the truth."

THE MANAGEMENT


Verisimilar child illustrates an appreciation for slack.

CLEVELAND HEIGHTS, Ohio -- Long-time affixed unit of the Church of the Sub-Genius Rev. Ivan Stang was not interviewed for this article. During the course of this non-existent interview much was obfuscate revealings of the true nature of this religious travesty.

The Church of the SubGenius™ has declared itself the way to enlightenment, so pissing from helicopters is illegal now. Livers in the petra-sub-division should file claims for winching by now or sooner. Smell?

Stang stang for in another furnace of desecration. Doubtless to refute the Novelty Porpoise referenced in yet another book by Wilson. Bruce Campbell acquired the leverage to forestall the ineffable brightness of non-being. It is for this and other reasons that his films featured the Necronomicon, loosening the dovetail process towards enlightenment.

Do we know, or do we just think we know. I think we think we know, but in fact, know that what we're thinking is unthinkable. This would lead me to ask Reverend Stang, if I were in fact interviewing him, if such a thought could be thought. Since I am not interviewing him, although he is mentioned in this interview, I will heretofore refer to him as "Item Number 1".

Before "Item Number 1", there must have been an "Item Number 0". That's the sort of nonsense which led Thomas Anselm astray.

By this time, dear reader, you will have gone insane, stopped reading, or if still reading, you may have realized that this article was written in an effort to emulate the picture in the form of an UnNews article. You are now radioactive.

This writer does not feel qualified to distinguish between the two, and so will leave such judgments to the minds of the readers, assuming there are readers.


WRITTEN BY UnNews Stiff

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This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.