UnNews:McCartney offers Heather Mills "a nice shoe"
| UnFair and UnBalanced | ✪ | UnNews | ✪ | Tuesday, November 5, 2024, 10:23:59 (UTC) |
| McCartney offers Heather Mills "a nice shoe" | 
|
17 October 2007
IT HAS BEEN REVEALED THAT former Rolling Stones frontman Paul McCartney has offered his estranged wife (the evil) Heather Mills a divorce settlement of a new shoe, Unnews reported next week.
Quoting a series of authentically fabricated sources, Unnews said that Sir Paul initially offered Mills a "nice, sensible walking shoe", but Mills's legal team had negotiated that up to "a durable, waterproofed hiking boot". One source suggested that "with the inclusion of a thermal sock we may be tantalisingly close to a deal".
"Whilst the acrimonious negotiations have been dragging for months and months and months and months and months Heather has finally managed to get them to hike the package up to a nice hiking boot," the fictitious source told Unnews.
Media reports have suggested that (the evil) Heather Mills, 39, was seeking up to three shoes, each to be supplied with a lifetime supply of appropriate polishes and cleaning products. Sir Pauls team rejected these claims "as outrageous" and threatened to have the money grabbing trollop killed.
Heather hilariously lost a leg a while ago.
Sources[edit]
- come on, say it with me GREED IS GOOD "greed is good". GREED IS GOD, October 17, 2007