Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/March 13

March 13: Friday the 13th (only when falling on a Friday), Sleeping Baby Day (pictured)

• 1259 BC - Thou art given a set of commandments to live by, while the rest of the Jews are free to do whatever they please, such as wandering in the desert and eating golden calves at expensive restaurants.
• 843 - The duck goes "quack."
• 1139 - Victor IV becomes the antipope, the first with an IV.
• 1809 - Swedish King Gustav IV is deposed, after posing for animal crackers.
• 1881 - On third-and-long, The Russia Revolutionaries (an expansion team) elects to go for the bomb, with Alexander II intercepting it and exploding for a touchdown.
• 1947 - The first murmurings of Holocaust denial denial surface when the existence of a Holocaust denial group in Geneva, Switzerland is questioned. Most people assume wrongly denial is in Egypt, not in Europe.
• 1991 - TV personality Maury Povich debuts as the host of the quizzically named Maury Povich Show.
• 1991 - Exxon is made to pay $1 billion for the Exxon Valdez oil spill. Exxon executives openly weep as they are forced to only increase their annual bonuses by 10% instead of the usual 30%. Their drug dealers go into a day of mourning.
• 2005 - Mobile phones with a new "voice chat" feature appear on the market, but are not well received.
• 2007 - The new and improved Pee Review is born, bringing Uncyclopedia authors down yet another peg.
• 2015 - March 13 falls on a Friday resulting in a million naughty kittens appearing in South America for the rest of the day.