Humour
“You know what's funny? Making the world 71% water and then putting SALT in almost all of it so that kids in Africa can't drink it and they die! Hahaha! Now THAT is humourous!”
“In my day, we used to spread humour on our toast and eat it for breakfast. No wait, that's not right.”
“Vi fra Ikkepedia føler veldig lei oss om hva som har hendt på Utøya og i Oslo fredag. Våre kondolanser går til alle som har mistet noen og ønsker mye trygghet for dem som overlevde tragedien. Dette er noe som aldri skal få friste til gjentakelse.”
Humour is describing things in a funny way. Humour is the English cousin of the good 'ol 'Merican way of saying humor (the incorrect way) and is nowhere near as funny, because only people with crooked teeth find British Chaps sitting under an umbrella, sipping tea, and telling over-the-top, dry jokes like:
- British Poppycock One: "I say, what did the baffoon say to the ruffian?"
- British Poppycock Two: "What, by heavens, did he say, good chap?"
- British Poppycock One: "He says 'Out of my way, I have a trolley to pilot!'"
- Both British Poppycocks: *profound snickering*
These are the types of things people from the U-knighted Kingdom find funny. Most Americans don't find European humour funny, but just find ugly European people funny. The reason why Europeans are not funny is because they live by a code of chivalry and cannot make a joke that would make anyone but other Europeans laugh.
Successful humour[edit]
Humour is successful depending on how funny it is. People will find things funny if they are unexpected, relative, random, witty, imaginative, crude, slapstick, poppycock, bedruzzled, filled with Oscar Wilde jokes, and relate to stale, unfunny internet memes. These are all things that European humour does not have ergo it is not funny.
The more people who understand the humour, the funnier it will be. For instance, only retards who spend all their time locked in their rooms, hunched over their computer, trolling 4chan, and watching gay hentai find interweb memes funny. This means that only a fraction of the people who read a certain article will find it funny if it is filled with jokes about LAZORS and Mudkipz and Anton LeVay.
To-date, there has never been a reported case of British humour not being funny; even though many people, particularly French, Germans, and Americans, cannot understand it.