Anne Robinson
“Man or Animal?”
“Even I would have to be hammered to do that Giggity giggity”
“Your wink makes you look like you're having a stroke”
Anne "Andy" Robinson (née Stalin, AKA The Welsh Hater or Kate Moss's Ugly Sister-in-Law), born 29 February 1337 BCE, is a British transsexual and host of the popular British game show "Who has the weakest wink?"
She holds the title of the first male-female transsexual to procreate with a Dutch man. The product of this union was Alan Gary Robinson, a footballer who uses the pseudonym Arjen Robben.
She is also patron saint of the religion Gingeranity under the mighty Lord Jaffa. Furthermore, she is renowned for her incredibly strong and loving relationship with the Welsh people. As an ageless female time lord, she has become the Patron Saint of Wales and is set to become their Queen and sole Ambassador in the future when Wales gains independence from David Cameron's Tory government.
Early Life[edit]
Anne Robinson was born Andy Robinson in a shack off the coast of South Irelandshire. Andy was the offspring of a freak pregnancy involving her two lesbian mothers which not only baffled doctors but also the 2 mothers who began questioning the sanitary conditions of that dildo they found.
Knowing he was a unique case, combined with his lesbian upbringing, he became a gender confused and depressed child who was constantly bullied by both the girls and boys in his class, teachers also picked on him because of his strange antics.
Andy to Anne[edit]
At the age of 16, Andy moved out of his parents home and into a cheaper, more run down shack (a few boxes and a dumpster) Andy decided he needed a sex change as he did not feel comfortable as a man so went into the prostitution business as gay gigolo.
After 2 years in the prostitution business Andy had both the money for the sex change operation and also had AIDS, so he consulted his doctor Doctor Zoidberg who promptly snapped off his meat and 2 veg before his nurse Hubert J. Farnsworth completed the sex change operation, although made some shortcuts as he couldn't be bothered.
Andy (now Anne) Robinson wasn't completely pleased at the operation but accepted and was shortly accepted as a circus freak, this provided a great opportunity for Anne, a free and better home, all the free peanuts she could want and all the Beastiality available to her.
The Weakest Wink[edit]
After just a few months into the circus business she was fired for a combination of scaring the children and giving all the animals AIDS. She then became very resentful towards humanity and made it her goal to infect as many people with AIDS as she could; that is when she got her opportunity.
On the 14th August 2000 Anne proposed her idea "The Weakest Wink" to the BBC and it of course was accepted as they are the biggest accepters of crap, being the only broadcasting company to out-crap Fox. The show was an instant hit due to many people just wanting to enter to draw smiley faces, flowers and other crap on the writing boards.
However there was a sinister side to the Weakest Wink; her snide comments, crude half-smile and bewitching wink were all methods of transferring AIDS to the contestants, audience and television viewers - yes, if you've watched The Weakest Wink you now have AIDS!
Anne Robinson was last seen infecting Americans on the American version of the show, "The Totally Most Bogus Wink".
The Robert Maxwell Affair[edit]
In 2002, Anne Robinson hosted an episode of Have I Got News For You in which the great Ian Hislop uncovered her scandalous love affair with Robert Maxwell. Anne however did not like this and felt Hislop knew too much so immediately raped him so he would contract her AIDS. However as Ian Hislop is too awesome he did not contract the AIDS and lives on!
Praise be to Ian Hislop.