Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:Allegations of 'bugging' are starting to bug the police
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UnNews:Allegations of 'bugging' are starting to bug the police[edit]
Knucmo2 22:21, 4 February 2008 (UTC)
A big mug o' reviewin' strength tea? Why, that must mean this article is being reviewed by: UU - natter (While you're welcome to review it as well, you might like to consider helping someone else instead). (Also, if the review hasn't been finished within 24 hours of this tag appearing, feel free to remove it or clout UU athwart the ear'ole). |
OK, I'll make this one my review o' the day. --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 11:40, Feb 20
Humour: | 7 | Yeah, I quite like this. Of course, it helps that I'm UK-ish and know what you're on about, but this is actually kind of satirical, and has some decent ideas. However, the line about making MPs spend all their time in the House isn't great - I think you need a better pay-off to that paragraph, although I am at a loss to suggest one. |
Concept: | 7 | Solid. You get the feeling it's the kind of thing the police would like to say. And I like the idea of the House of Commons reality TV show. You could probably take that further, although it may seem like going too far from the central idea of the article. However, dismissing the BBC Parliament Channel as "not entertaining enough" could work. "After all, ours will be hosted by a micro celebrity, and have talking heads debating minor issues in a rapidly-edited style. We'll probably also have a dedicated "George Galloway cam", to keep tabs on the most entertaining MP at all times." That sort of thing anyway. Just a suggestion. |
Prose and formatting: | 7 | Fine in the main, although a couple of points: You should really introduce Ian Blair as "Sir Ian Blair" and include his job title. Refer to him thereafter how you like, but it helps explain things to readers who don't know who he is, and makes it feel more "newsy". Also, you have far too many red links. Either remove them, or link them more creatively to articles that do exist. |
Images: | 5 | Hmm, one, and it's a dull one of Jack "Captain Charisma" Straw at that. Not an attention grabber, although it is relevant and captioned reasonably well. Perhaps another pic, such as one of a bug, or an MP with a bug on his shoulder (wrong kind of bug for comedy purposes), or a pic of George Galloway doing something stupid - plenty to choose from, I should think - or something. Another pic, preferably with a slightly higher amusement value, would help, and offset the Jack Staw one a bit better. |
Miscellaneous: | 6.5 | Averaged - it's the law, don'tcher know? |
Final Score: | 32.5 | I like this one. It's definitely a cut above quite a few Un-Newses. Of course, thanks to the wait time on the Pee queue, it's not as topical as it was, but that's no fault of yours. Consider the suggestions I've made above, but overall, I enjoyed reading this, and it's a decent bit of un-news. Final comment: this is only my opinion, others are available, and good luck! |
Reviewer: | --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 12:05, Feb 20 |