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Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/January 22
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January 22: National Cover-Up Day (USA)
- 1012 - The second coming does not happen.
- 1492 - Nothing happens. You didn't see anything, so it doesn't count.
- 1776 - The United States of America was always unquestionably free.
- 1812 - We have reasonable cause to attack.
- 1847 - The United States retaliates against a Mexican surprise attack.
- 1861 - The United States is completely united.
- 1965 - The United States irrefutably wins the Vietnam War in seven games.
- 1974 - President Nixon finishes out his "optional" term of office.
- 2001 - Heavy winds cause the World Trade Center towers to weaken.
- 2003 - The United States irrefutably wins the War in Iraq in a 4-game whitewash.
- 2005 - It is the policy of this Administration not to discuss ongoing investigations.
- 2006 - Global Warming? What Global Warming?
- 2007 - There is no Grand Conspiracy.
- 2012 - The Mayan calendar is misinterpreted, since nobody is alive who still reads or speaks Mayan. Turns out they were talking about the end of a cycle rather than the end of the world.
- 2021 - The Deep State and Antifa decide to battle it out with each other. Nobody notices because they are all hiding from Coronavirus in their bunkers.