UnNews:Duke of Edinburgh stays firm behind the wheel

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21 January 2019

Duke of Edinburgh:'I'm a road warrior'.

London, United Kingdom -- The Duke of Edinburgh is in a 'defiant mood' after he was involved in a car accident by some careless subjects of his wife, Elizabeth II of Great Britain. The 97 year old Prince Philip blames 'idiots' for refusing to make an emergency stop when his automobile pulled out of a side road in Sandringham, Norfolk where he was staying for a spot of shooting and drinking.

Those ruddy idiots.., he said climbing out of his car..don't they know the roads are owned by wife? When they see a royal car coming they should slow down, get out and bow..not hit the accelerator and bash me!! If I was a real monarch's escort, those peasants would be either transported to Australia or hung on a gibbet. It's a disgrace.

Prince Philip back behind the wheel

The local police have interviewed Prince Philip and checked his breath for alcohol. He refused to be given an intimate body search in case he was also dealing with drugs.

So far there has been no official word from Queen Elizabeth. Prince Philip has been given another car and was seen out again driving along the local roads. People say he should be preceded by a man holding the Union Jack to avoid future accidents.


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