UnNews:China Losing Taste for Debt From the U.S.

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Straight talk, from straight faces UnNews Wednesday, May 29, 2024, 14:33:59 (UTC)

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8 January 2009
Unnews staff reporter - Bejing

China is losing its taste for US Debt according to the Chinese government. With a population approaching 3 Billion China has recently eradicated the malnutrition and famine of the early revolutionary years by feeding its infants and young people on US Treasury bonds in preference to more traditional foodstuffs.

A communist party spokesman said:

"During the early years we requisitioned farms and used them to try to feed the population. In the end we realised that the only way for Communism to triumph over decadent Western Capitalism was to eat it - literally. As a result we purchased US government bonds and stuffed them down the throats of our infants. Very young infants were weaned onto bonds with a 1 year maturity whilst older kids dined exclusively on the 5 to 10 year maturities. Unfortunately due to the recent credit crunch the nutritional value of these paper instruments have declined rapidly and we are therefore having to move back to traditional Chinese fare such as sweet and sour pork and Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream"