UnNews:1 dead, 30 injured, 5 rednecks

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Your A.D.D. news outl — Oooh, look at the pictures! UnNews Thursday, December 2, 2021, 06:50:59 (UTC)

1 dead, 30 injured, 5 rednecks UnNews Logo Potato.png

20 December 2012

See the ATVs?

NEW YORK CITY, New York - A crash on Long Island has left one person dead and thirty people injured.

Police report that the crash was caused by five rednecks on ATVs who later fled the scene of the crime. They drove up to the site of the crash, chanting, "This is for God, Guns and Ron Paul," resulting in the massive crash. Aerial shots from News12 Long Island showed at least one tractor-trailer and several cars apparently damaged by fire. The roadway was closed between exits 65 and 69. Authorities expected the eastbound section to be closed for hours, probably through the night..

A recent check of the rednecks indicate that they were sponsored by the National Rifle Association. So far, three suspects have been found, Engine Nighthawk Palin, Steak Tractor Palin, and Rick Santorum. The NRA has not yet claimed responsibility.