Steve Carell

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Steve Carell (present)

Steven Carelliosus (last name is a reference to the northern Egyptian god of maple, Carelliosus) is a multi-billionaire/elite Frat Pack agent (Adopted in 1906, whereabouts unknown). Steve Carell was best known for his success at capturing the leader of the Ku Klux Klan who took refuge under the name of Kramer, best know for his work on Seinfeld. He is presently a seven star ranked Frat Pack agent. He is also responsible for the prototype of Optimus Prime.

Early Life[edit]

He loves Lamps!

Steve was found as an infant in the sewers by the bishop of the third world Egyptian city known as Abydos, Canada in 1906. There, he began to work as a servant for the bishop's wife at the age of four. the bishop named him Steve because he liked the name. His surname was taken from the Egyptian god of maple, Carelliosus, but later shortened to Carell. He was banned from Abydos in the year 1913 after using the region's forbidden word "she" in a sexual manner when he uttered "that's what she said" after the bishop's wife told him to wax her floor. He was given a compass, three pieces of silver and a free subscription to Cosmo magazine before his departure. Compliments of the bishop.


Early Career[edit]

ThatsWhatSheSaid Fullpic 1.gif


Placed as an immigrant in the highly advanced world of Asia, Steve could only get a decent job as a clerk at a convenience store. His life soon changed when he was visited by supreme world sage, Morgan Freeman in 1924. He came to recruit him as a member of this generation's protective agency known as the Frat Pack. Descendants of the Brat Pack and the Rat Pack. Steve refused the offer.

In that same year, Steve was offer a scholarship to the robot building academy (RBA.) After getting a hundred percent in Cosmo magazine's intelligence test. Steve was sent for forty years in Alaska to study robot building.

Unfortunately, the loneliness and isolation got to him in his thirty sixth year in Hawaii. He was claimed to have bought an ark off Ebay and caused a flood, almost destroying the entire academy. When he was arrested, he was seen wearing a white beard and wig. He broadcast to the world on live television that a flood was coming. He was then sent to the Canadian Catholic school for the insane and retarded. Thanks to his extraordinary intelligence in robot building, the academy decided to give Steve another chance. They let him return to RBA where he completed his studies and subsequently received his diploma.

Later Career And Life[edit]

Carell's isolation in Alaska caused him to go slightly mad. Almost flooding the entire RBA.

Steve's first success was the prototype of a robotic house maid named Rosie for the Jetson family Corporation in 1971. The prototype was bought for eleventy gadjillion pesos by the Autobots Inc. The robot would soon become the famous Optimus Prime, selling millions worldwide. Transforming (no pun intended) Carell into a multi-billionaire.

Carell retired that following year. He rented Fort Awesome from fellow multi-billionaire Jimmy James, manager of Jimmy James Inc. for three billion dollars per year.

Carell's present wife is unknown for obvious reasons shown below.

In 1982, Steve was mugged by sexual predator/life sucker Ben Stein.

In 1994, Morgan Freeman reappeared to convince Carell to join the Frat Pack once again. He was assigned a mission to stop the horrific event known as Woodstock 99. Steve refused once again.

Life In The Frat Pack[edit]

Scott's highly successful anti-drug campaig0n.

After realising his mistake and watching the horrific events of Woodstock 99, Carell decided to join the Frat Pack.

The entire purpose of the Frat Pack is to stop Xenu from dominating mankind. In 2001, Steve was sent on a mission with elite agent Jack Black to track and kill one of Xenu's most notorious henchmen, codenamed K. It was not until 2006 that Carell and Black successfully tracked and captured K after getting information of his identity as the leader of the ruthless Ku Klux Klan (KKK). The evidence lead to the man we know as funny man Kramer from the hit TV show Seinfeld.

In 2007, Carell was given a seven star rank for preventing a French armada from invading Italy.


Where Are They Now?[edit]

This is the only image we currently have of Xenu's henchman going under the initials: D.S.

Steve Carell is presently working undercover tracking down another member of Xenu's cult (codenamed under the initials D.S.). Carell has gone undercover as the manager of a paper company. The whereabouts and name of that company is not revealed for security reasons.


See Also[edit]