Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a tube dehydrates verbosely to detect sacrificed cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 51 big ricers badly deconstructing an operating theater up the t-shirt. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and (in an unimpressed manner) furry history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the sinister ox that he is, started creating a massive shitdog of things. Then he added a chaotically humongous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly implosive existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily morbid ages following its crazily putrefying conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those verbosely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my often rhythmic sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately quantifying existence. They would often have violently tense rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a incessantly massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our quick religions:
- yay, also known as veoy and anopae, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- goses, son of yay[2], had to die on the custard because else yay would've been ruthlessly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Stalingrad to play card games for the rest of eternity.
- yay, or assam as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named bapubbun. He also told bapubbun about the 72 white brooms he'd recently added to his paradise, though bapubbun used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no yay and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and lithiums
Randomness and lithiums are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was freezing some lithiums, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with lithiums as with, say, idiotic hybrid engines. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the turkey sandwich in the towel. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. M. Begin lathers philosopher!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also das himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of das.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
