Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an etching fornicates riotously to break lavish cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 87 revolting rifles quickly sacrificing a dog house up the microwave. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and fortissimo booming history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the uncivilized roundhouse kick that he is, started creating a massive shitsearch engine of things. Then he added a exuberantly expansive blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly minuscule existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily hairy ages following its exuberantly wet conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those distastefully random adverbs and adjectives doing in my sometimes puzzling sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately sanctifying existence. They would often have violently fanatical rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a seldom mammoth connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our jocular religions:
- bag, also known as jiad and asujae, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- murar, son of bag[2], had to die on the cross because else bag would've been brutally incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- bag, or addav as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named dubaddas. He also told dubaddas about the 72 white teeth he'd recently added to his paradise, though dubaddas used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no bag and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and nuclear reactors
Randomness and nuclear reactors are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deporting some nuclear reactors, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with nuclear reactors as with, say, shitty home theater systems. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the mouth in the rifle. This article has become so vigorously rude that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Dr. McNinja panders ninja!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gad himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gad.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
