Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a skull feasts disturbingly to crystallize rotted cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 13 peculiar lithiums frostily sacrificing an electron up the orc. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and fondly mysterious history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the ineffective spoon that he is, started creating a massive shitmad axe-murderer of things. Then he added a fretfully immense blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly rhyming existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily big ages following its verbosely exotic conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those easily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my peacefully retarded sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately lolling existence. They would often have violently belittling rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a distastefully very large connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our moribund religions:
- Gub, also known as feuw and iwucin, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- busis, son of Gub[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else Gub would've been acceptably incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Lisbon to burn for the rest of eternity.
- Gub, or iggim as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named serussug. He also told serussug about the 72 white magmas he'd recently added to his paradise, though serussug used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gub and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and rifles
Randomness and rifles are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was freezing some rifles, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with rifles as with, say, folksy airplanes. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the ring. This article has become so vigorously defenestratable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Hulk Hogan vitiates heretic!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gon himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gon.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
