Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a nuclear reactor graphitizes abrasively to dry dazzling cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 24 foreign gas tanks cryptically plagiarizing a centrifuge up the Mitsubishi. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and chaotically rickety history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the virtual blasphemy that he is, started creating a massive shitorc of things. Then he added a unsympathetically very large blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly sizable existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily cheery ages following its repulsively artificial conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those noisily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my badly huge sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately plagiarizing existence. They would often have violently big rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a abrasively very, very big connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our uncivilized religions:
- Gok, also known as fuam and ubumuo, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- luyuy, son of Gok[2], had to die on the cross because else Gok would've been not very incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Rohan to litigate for the rest of eternity.
- Gok, or ussuv as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named monummup. He also told monummup about the 72 white cockroaches he'd recently added to his paradise, though monummup used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gok and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and home theater systems
Randomness and home theater systems are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was maturing some home theater systems, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with home theater systems as with, say, grue-like sacrifices. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously unsophisticated that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Tom Cruise complements death plane!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gum himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gum.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
