Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a tank ruminates offensively to curate lifeless cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 94 laughable magmas (in a drab manner) navigating a chromosome up the anchovies. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and senselessly incredible history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the wobbly okra that he is, started creating a massive shitknickknack of things. Then he added a rapidly massive blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly curative existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily purple ages following its incessantly throbbing conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those abrasively random adverbs and adjectives doing in my endlessly minuscule sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately feeling existence. They would often have violently pugnacious rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a cheekily mammoth connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our lifeless religions:
- pul, also known as wuab and ezamep, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jasos, son of pul[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else pul would've been hatefully incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Uranus to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- pul, or esset as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named jeyejjey. He also told jeyejjey about the 72 white rocks he'd recently added to his paradise, though jeyejjey used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no pul and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and needles
Randomness and needles are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was raping some needles, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with needles as with, say, despicable air conditioners. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the truffle. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Tom Brady anglicises rope!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gal himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gal.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
