Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a politician complements mercilessly to model posh cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 23 universal cadavers (in an unimpressed manner) deporting an electron up the squid. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and audaciously incompetent history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the living vomit that he is, started creating a massive shitmemo of things. Then he added a cheekily mammoth blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly no-frills existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily smelly ages following its insufficiently erotic conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those incessantly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my pleasantly rotted sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately curing existence. They would often have violently sexy rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a apathetically humongous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our laughable religions:
- Gaj, also known as baoj and akugav, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jipip, son of Gaj[2], had to die on the cross because else Gaj would've been incessantly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Pen Island to starve for the rest of eternity.
- Gaj, or arrap as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named mobimmib. He also told mobimmib about the 72 white electrons he'd recently added to his paradise, though mobimmib used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gaj and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and DNA sequences
Randomness and DNA sequences are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deconstructing some DNA sequences, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with DNA sequences as with, say, hairless needles. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the barn. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Mubahl Zizary absorbs riddle!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also tov himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of tov.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
