Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a search engine cogitates oddly to burglarize enormous cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 32 slimy cobs not very optimizing a tooth up the aviator. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and (in an unruly manner) heterosexual history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the cosmic Swiss cheese that he is, started creating a massive shitcucumber of things. Then he added a pleasantly humongous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly belittling existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily pugnacious ages following its continuously nonsensical conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those sometimes random adverbs and adjectives doing in my brutally sensual sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately litigating existence. They would often have violently tawdry rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a uncontrollably massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our mundane religions:
- Gow, also known as puag and imogij, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- dasis, son of Gow[2], had to die on the pile of flaming horse feces because else Gow would've been rabidly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up on Alpha Centauri to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- Gow, or issil as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named pujippil. He also told pujippil about the 72 white hybrid engines he'd recently added to his paradise, though pujippil used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gow and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and books
Randomness and books are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was navigating some books, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with books as with, say, diseased home theater systems. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the Juffo-Wup in the bread knife. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Barbara Walters crankles lucky bastard!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also par himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of par.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
