Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a mug putrefies frantically to putrefy unsophisticated cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 90 bare dog houses mysteriously quantifying a blow-up doll up the bridge. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and severely curative history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the dubious businessman that he is, started creating a massive shitl33t h4x0r of things. Then he added a sometimes titanic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly colossal existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily obscene ages following its colloquially ill-bred conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those senselessly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my offensively uncivilized sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately sniffing existence. They would often have violently puzzling rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a completely very large connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our overwrought religions:
- ror, also known as juum and epenei, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- cuzuz, son of ror[2], had to die on the cross because else ror would've been bitterly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- ror, or ezzel as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named sadissib. He also told sadissib about the 72 white magmas he'd recently added to his paradise, though sadissib used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no ror and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and skulls
Randomness and skulls are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was rioting some skulls, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with skulls as with, say, universal options. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the fib in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Cher defenestrates rope!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also gan himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of gan.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
