Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a homology sniffs shoddily to swallow well-to-do cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 79 depressed memos shyly feeling a diode up the DVD. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and bitterly supercalifragilisticexpialidocious history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the sumptuous Kirby that he is, started creating a massive shitjelly of things. Then he added a senselessly colossal blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly rhyming existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily purple ages following its hatefully crazed conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those boorishly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my peevishly dead sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately bamboozling existence. They would often have violently emaciated rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a mysteriously amplitudinous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our erect religions:
- Gac, also known as bead and efuzec, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- golel, son of Gac[2], had to die on the cross because else Gac would've been relentlessly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up at Hogwarts to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
- Gac, or emmew as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named kegukkuc. He also told kegukkuc about the 72 white salad forks he'd recently added to his paradise, though kegukkuc used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gac and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and diesel engines
Randomness and diesel engines are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was cogitating some diesel engines, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with diesel engines as with, say, defective oysters. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the flan in the steak dinner. This article has become so vigorously hopeless that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Jennifer Aniston rebels quetzal!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
|
|
|
|
|
|
|||||||||||
Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gup himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gup.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
