Neverwinter Nights

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The main character shortly before the final showdown with Queen Morag. The encounter is complete with dynamic graphical effects.

“I was devastated when I discovered that my copy of the game was affected by the terrible case of fraud.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Neverwinter Nights

Neverwinter Nights (NWN), the hit game of 1998, was eventually found to have been all a money-grabbing scheme, producers claimed that Neverwinter Nights would keep away the winter forever. The police received an anonymous tip from a Concerned citizen from the state of New York (AKA The Large Pear). After further investigation the police realized that the person behind the fraud was none other than the French spaceman and gardener André Thé Giant. At the time (he was arrested in 1934 for publicly fighting with jolly green giant), he was put to death in 2001 in the Hillbilly county jail and executed in the warden's shed with a makeshift electric chair (made with a rocking chair, loose wires and a car battery).


The game 'Neverwinter Nights' was a hit game made by BioWare, the same company that produced other hit games such as:

  • Medal of Honour: Kill the Japs
  • Medal of Honour: Kill the Germans
  • Medal of Honour: Pointless Killing
  • Medal of Honour: The Official Nazi Simulator

The game was designed to be a simulator for medieval warlords, it then moved on to be a fantasy game with magic and fairies. The game sold over 750 million copies over the span of a few months and has become the most profitable game in history since GTA: Shitty Sequel. It features a badly done 'create a character' mode where all models are the same, except some choices of heads are more fuzzy than others. You then, using your character, go on a whirlwind of adventure at meet many characters (some named Child002 or Peasant358) mainly named stuff like Algazaar and Beromath and other names like that. The game was rated 63rd in the worlds top ten worst games in the world. Despite that, Neverwinter Nights was still a hit and bought by millions of Giant Gaming Ind. worldwide.


Neverwinter Nights was supposed to be a magical game where the magic was outside of the game too, producers (mainly André Thé Giant) claimed that owning the game will keep winter away forever and stop the yeti ripping you into a thousand inch by inch squares. This was widely believed until an investigation by the AGPCEA (The Anti Games Producers Cheating Enforcement Agency) was carried out, after millions of unhappy fans called in on November 23rd 1998, the investigation was to determine whether the game keeps the weather at bay.


On January 4th 2000, André Thé Giant was arrested while on a space expedition and brought back to Earth in a paddy wagon, with his entire crew, which consisted of four Looney Tunes and a Level Designer named Geoffrey, who was later released as he was said to have "no knowledge of the fraud, he just made the game". André was sentenced to 34 years in prison, but was released on parole because he was "a good boy". He then spent the rest of his life tending to his garden. The four Looney Tunes, on the other hand, spent the rest of their lives in the Detroit Maximum Security Prison, in which they started the worst crime family in the world. Actually, as none of them were related, they couldn't start a real family, as there were no women in a Maximum Security prison and the only member allowed to leave was the janitor, but he was 50 years old and had a serious hip injury.


The company released details that a sequel to the game named Nights will be released next year, but the dates have not been confirmed. Police have yet to see if the owners of the game will really have a Night. Although André Thé Giant has had nothing to do with the production of this game, there is no doubt he will get the blame for the game.


Played by people, who like the common wowobssesed "Nerd/Geek" (for lack of a better word)find enjoyment siting in front of a computer "Pwning"(??) thier enemys simply because, "omfg N@@B"(??). although unlike wow these nerds/geeks also find endless amounts of enjoyment playing by them self.