Welcome to the Mother Ship of amateur comedy writing! (Amateur means we don't pay you to do it.)
This is where the original Uncyclopedia wound up. You might as well pick a user name. We have no "partners" that want to sell you stuff. Giving your email simply lets you recover your password; we don't send spam. Uncyclopedians get a talk page, private edit area, and a welcome, maybe, if you actually edit; and we won't de-platform you for your views, if they're funny.
I don't believe I know you
Hey, you there. I see you there in the middle of this dimly lit street.
You're in the shadows, I see, but you've been following me for quite a while.
Hey, come on
Why don't you come into the glow of the streetlight? Is there something you don't want me to see?
I'd like to know who you are and why you're so interested in my whereabouts.
Ah, here you come
Ah, yes. I see you coming towards me now. I see that you are quite an interesting fellow,
but I'll never judge a book by its cover. I like your coat. It's very stylish.
Hey... wait...
H- hey, what are you doing? Is that a knife? Wait, what did I do to you? Did I say something?
Oh SHIT! Oh God, OH GOD. LEAVE ME ALONE. POLICE! POLICE! HELP! ANYONE HELP! I AM TOO YOUNG TO DIE!
No, NO!
DON'T HURT ME! PLEASE! DON'T HURT ME! AAAAAAAAA! AAAAHH... ahh. ah... *thud*