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 A dark cove (with brown rocks) Score: 22 Moves: 90

Once you go east, you suddenly see the king grue's ghost appear, say Mao (pronounced MOW - not MAYO, idiot) and then disappear, leaving you more confused then when you walked in this god-forsaken room.

After swearing for a few minutes, out of a combination of frustration, confusion, and... something else with "ion" at the end, the strange elven sword that you need suddenly appears and obliterates you. Then your remains fall into a pool of lava. Then a nuclear bomb from the U.S. blows you up. Then, somehow, after all of that, you are eaten by a Grue. Then you are magically respawned to the exact same moment that this long paragraph started and the same thing happened again... and again... and again... and again...

You died about 5 million times before finally committing suicide while the king grue is saying mao. On the plus side, will never go to Hell, you have fantastic grammar, and at least the grue eats you quickly and neatly so you don't end up as a pile of crap that looks like a grue got sick.

*** You kicked the bucket ***

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