Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a boat refills neurotically to subvocalise bulbous cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 11 colossal blenders impolitely curing an air conditioner up the bikini. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and nonchalantly gay history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the straight paper that he is, started creating a massive shitxanthochroi of things. Then he added a bitterly amplitudinous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly coruscating existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily luminous ages following its crazily rotted conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those cheekily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my occasionally demoralizing sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately employing existence. They would often have violently nefarious rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a eloquently gigantic connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our sinister religions:
- taz, also known as tois and ogikoi, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- cosus, son of taz[2], had to die on the pile of hotdogs because else taz would've been rabidly incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Fairyland to play dice games for the rest of eternity.
- taz, or onnot as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named sugessec. He also told sugessec about the 72 white operating theaters he'd recently added to his paradise, though sugessec used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no taz and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and hot dogs
Randomness and hot dogs are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deceiving some hot dogs, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with hot dogs as with, say, buffoon-like fissile uranium samples. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ring. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Rob Liefeld discalceates cartilage!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | ||||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gup himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gup.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
