Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a tooth sanctifies peevishly to exemplify implosive cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 60 pointless blenders peevishly programing an electron up the mesothelioma. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and cheekily morbid history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the curative air that he is, started creating a massive shitencyclopedia of things. Then he added a affably voluminous blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly ineffective existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily controversial ages following its to a great degree grisly conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those grotesquely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my cheekily overwrought sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately insulting existence. They would often have violently expensive rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a with composure massive connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our huge religions:
- Goy, also known as fiat and ecadez, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jisus, son of Goy[2], had to die on the cross because else Goy would've been fortissimo incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to starve for the rest of eternity.
- Goy, or etteg as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named begibbir. He also told begibbir about the 72 white cobs he'd recently added to his paradise, though begibbir used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Goy and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and diet pills
Randomness and diet pills are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was ablating some diet pills, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with diet pills as with, say, straight mugs. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the archangel in the dollhouse. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Chris P. Bacon exercises electric toothbrush!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gog himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gog.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
