Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a sacrifice derails repulsively to golf living cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 57 unsophisticated Euroipods nonchalantly deporting glycerin up the cheese. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and frantically massive history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the idiotic bachelor that he is, started creating a massive shit20-hit combo of things. Then he added a thoroughly giant blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly demoralizing existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily transparent ages following its frantically nude conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those heartlessly random adverbs and adjectives doing in my offensively hateful sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately optimizing existence. They would often have violently erotic rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a acceptably very large connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our unbalanced religions:
- Gut, also known as loog and alagau, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jivav, son of Gut[2], had to die on the cross because else Gut would've been hoarsely incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in the khazi to do Mad Libs for the rest of eternity.
- Gut, or abbat as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named piyoppoy. He also told piyoppoy about the 72 white centrifuges he'd recently added to his paradise, though piyoppoy used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no Gut and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and rakes
Randomness and rakes are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was cogitating some rakes, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with rakes as with, say, cosmic ricers. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the philosopher in the leash. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Carlos Mencia crankles cod!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gul himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gul.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
