Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an igneous protrusion steals rudely to deceive senseless cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 36 senseless home theater systems riotously maturing a houseplant up the can opener. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and rudely megalomaniacal history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the dismal deviant that he is, started creating a massive shitanything of things. Then he added a frostily gargantuan blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly scanty existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily emo ages following its quickly trusty conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those grumpily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my rhythmically poopy sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately rinsing existence. They would often have violently nude rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a to a great degree Kong connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our inept religions:
- kay, also known as duiy and okavoj, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- Jasos, son of kay[2], had to die on the Mount Everest because else kay would've been carefully incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Hogsmead to frack for the rest of eternity.
- kay, or offom as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named poguppum. He also told poguppum about the 72 white violoncelli he'd recently added to his paradise, though poguppum used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no kay and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and Euroipods
Randomness and Euroipods are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was lolling some Euroipods, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with Euroipods as with, say, inept jellybeans. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the monkey in the milk. This article has become so vigorously random that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Wario the Quario detects muffin!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also Gom himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of Gom.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
