Randomness
Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an air conditioner deceives neurotically to hear lovely cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 43 wobbly miscellanious dead things eloquently feasting a lawn mower up the freedom fighter. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
History
Randomness has had a long and endlessly red history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the sumptuous diamond that he is, started creating a massive shitautomobile of things. Then he added a fortissimo hulking blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly puce existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily sensual ages following its insufficiently huge conception.[1]
Hey, what are all those callously random adverbs and adjectives doing in my puzzlingly depressed sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately swallowing existence. They would often have violently cute rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a coarsely enormous connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our rhyming religions:
- buk, also known as noir and orimok, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- sesus, son of buk[2], had to die on the cross because else buk would've been neurotically incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in our room to vomit for the rest of eternity.
- buk, or oggot as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named setissik. He also told setissik about the 72 white homicidal screaming carrots he'd recently added to his paradise, though setissik used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no buk and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and ricers
Randomness and ricers are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was writing some ricers, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with ricers as with, say, natural ovens. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Dr. McNinja optimizes animal!
See also
Supposedly random sighting(s)[6] | |||||||||||||||
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Footnotes
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also tor himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of tor.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.
