Student syndrome
“Just do it... tomorrow.”
Student syndrome, a medical condition present in all students [1] (Studentus Academicus), makes it so that all the work gets done in the last moment. The average life expectancy of such people who engage in such behavior is around 12 weeks. This is not an effective survival technique at all, and some scholars immune to this disease consider it as a maladaptive behavior, but that doesn't stop the armada of zombies from overloading the university servers by conjunctively submitting their homework at 11:59pm.
Stages[edit]
The party[edit]
The student spends most of their time partying, and sleeping. Sometimes both, depending on how much partying they have done beforehand. Alcohol, and possibly other not so legal drugs, are commonly consumed during this phase. This supposedly enhances the experience, but sometimes makes the user forget it even happened in the first place. Some students party so much, that it can make Charlie Sheen jealous.
The all-nighter[edit]
The day before the exam. This is the most popular time to study. Not the most effective though. Catching up on months of material, in just one night. Large quantities of caffeine are strongly recommend if you attempt this.
- Pros: You're actually studying for once.
- Cons: You probably won't survive to tell the tale.
The exam[edit]
The dreaded day. The exam day. It has finally arrived. You sit down. The exam is in front of you. You open it. You read the question. You try to answer it, but fail. You cross it out, and move onto the next one. It is about the previous question, so you move on yet again. The clock is ticking. The time is over. You did it. You completed the exam. How hard was that?
The aftermath[edit]
The exam is no more. What follows next is the repetition of the cycle. Party time.
References[edit]
- ↑ Excluding people majoring in tourusm, as they don't even do anything