Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/September 24

September 24: Mudkip Appreciation Day

• 3000 BCE - Greek philosopher Atheises founds the Order of Dyslexic Atheists and declares as its motto "Thert isi thaer no doG!".
• 322 BCE - Isocrates teaches that Mudkip is the key to all understanding. Violent disagreement follows with Aristotle taking his Jigglypuff home in disgust.
• 1336 - Austrian troops invading Switzerland find pots of fondue set out for them along with plastic sporks. Thousand of soldiers die from third-degree burns from stringy melted cheese and melted plastic. Switzerland agrees to limit the use of fondue in the Treaty of Lausanne.
• 1541 - Paracelsus, Swiss alchemist, passes away after being drained by a bitter rivalry with the alchemist Parafahrenheit.
• 1612 - After a massive invasion of the Netherlands, Spain realizes they already own the place. They redouble their destructive efforts as punishment for the Dutch not telling them this.
• 1789 - United States History: the position of Attorney General is established, to act as general over the army of attorneys raised during the Revolutionary War.
• 1906 - U.S. President Theodore Roosevelt proclaims Devils Tower the nation's first National Monument after obsessively sculpting the rock formation in mashed potatoes.
• 1939 - Adolf Hitler gets into a hedge dispute with his Polish neighbour.
• 1991 - Jesus is found alive and well in a Manchester crackhouse.
• 1993 - Karl Marx's personal diaries discovered, Marxism apparently is just a wind up to bug the Americans.
• 2003 - George Bush declares war on Legoland.
• 2004 - Thought to be driven to extinction by heavy distribution in a McDonald's giveaway, a surviving colony of Mudkips are found in the Malaysian jungle. The group of scientists discovering them are found dead inside their own Pokéballs.
• 2006 - Michael Jackson sues himself for sexual assault and wins. He celebrates by sexually assaulting himself again.
• 2007 - This is the last day of Adventalo, the gathering of millions of nerds awaiting the coming of the chiefus christ.
• 2008 - War veteran Big Bird commits suicide after receiving hate mail for accidentally sinking China when he flushed the toilet.
• 2009 - All 8 followers of the new-found religion Walmartism are sentenced to death after reports of attacks on rival gang The "Food Lion Elite".