HowTo:Double Entendre

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A double entendre is a method used by experts of aerial tactics in order to make a 'kill'. By reading this HowTo guide, you too can easily become a professional in popping this cherry of a maneuver.

The Breakdown[edit]

Stage One: Beatdown[edit]

Do your duty, soldier.

The maneuver begins by beating the stick until the throttle has achieved maximum height. At this point, your wingman, who should be with you at all times (even if not attempting a Double Entendre), should engage all bogies other than your target(s), preferably from behind, so as to divert the bogies' attention. This will leave you alone with the target.

Stage Two: Unload or Lick, Dammit![edit]

At this point, you should unload a salvo, or possibly, if you are quite skilled, achieve the '69' setup with your target, by going in the opposite direction, and trying to threaten the opponent by nearly 'licking' the belly of their aircraft with the belly of your aircraft. If you find the opportunity, you should enter the phase called 'doing the nasty' (so named for the gruesome results) by shooting into the enemy cockpit, and if successful, blood should ooze from the cockpit.

This pilot has had the 'nasty' done to them, probably with a six inch cannon.

Stage Three: Victory at Last![edit]

If you unloaded a salvo, instead of achieving the '69' setup, you should finger the C-flap in your cockpit, and the next salvo should be instantly prepared, if done correctly. At this point, the enemy pilot should be at your knees, sucking your glory, begging to give it up to you. If so, congratulations, you have successfully given the enemy pilot a good run for your their money.

History of The Double Entendre[edit]

The Double Entendre originally started in the 'e'th century as a method for drilling it, a secret technique only known by ancient masters of the art of motorboating, where a pair of men would stand on a boat, and one man would put his head in between two fish, and rapidly move his head back and force, erecting the piston that allows the other man to control the flow of liquid, whatever it is that you are boating through.

Historical Use of the Double Entendre[edit]

See?! See how much those lips resemble hers?!
e'th Century: Oscar Wilde uses 30 different Double Entendres to seduce George Washington into letting him cuddle with his cherry tree.
15th Century: Oscar Wilde, growing more adept in the use of the deadly DE, only used 10 Double Entrendres to seduce George Bush's relatively close genetic relative, the Platypus.

Successful DE kills in World War One[edit]

  • Edward V. Rickenbacker shot down William C. Lambert, using a Double Entendre on June 10, 1915. As said by scholar Rick D. Douche,
"And the Legendary Rickenbacker didith spotith the Lambert, and with a great yell of fury, said "I'm coming to kill you, Hitler! Rickenbacker, quickly came up behind Lambert, and penetrated his hull. The Lambert did fall, and is said to have said 'What the fuck, nub?' when Rickenbacker shot him down."
  • James McCudden shot down William C. Lambert, using a Double Entendre on June 11, 1915. Lambert is said to have said, "OK nub, look, I know it's still the same person. Quit teamkilling, stupid nub, or I'll fucking Double Entendre you."
  • O.C. "Boots" LeBoutillier shot down William C. Lambert, mistaking him for Adolf Hitler, using half of a Double Entendre yesterday. Lambert was seen throwing a temper tantrum on the way down. When asked on the scene, William C. Lambert said "I'm gonna fucking kill that nub."
  • William Thaw and Billy Bishop shot each other down at the same time with Double Entendres, mistaking each other for William C. Lambert on June 12, 1915. Lambert came down with a case of the wtf's when he saw with, and thus he crashed.
  • Frank Luke Jr. shot down William C. Lambert, using a Double Entendre on June 13, 1915.
  • I shot down William C. Lambert, using a Double Entendre on June 14, 1915. Actually, I didn't. I used one of those fancy new Colt .45's and shot him. But that's a story for another day. I think I'm going to file for being removed from this list, since I think it's kind of lame. Ciao.
    William C. Lambert. Ah. No wonder all the Allies tried to get Lambert down.
  • William C. Lambert shot down William C. Lambert, using a Double Entendre on June 15, 1915. Most Double Entendre experts, including me, have deemed this impossible, but it seems that it happened anyways, nobody cares the laws of physics.
  • The Army Air Forces shot down William C. Lambert, for his failure to stay up for more than one day. Every soldier in the Allied Forces had to use a Double Entendre on him, resulting in the phrase "going over 'the top'".
  • William C. Lambert, in a stunning display, planelessly Mr. T'd and Double Entendre'd the Red Baron, on June 16.4, 1915. Given the fact that he was currently being sent back to the good old United States, this is widely considered by experts one of the most amazing feats. Ever. Unsurprisingly, Lambert once again came down with a case of the wtf's
  • Double Entendre Russian Reversals YOU!!, today, when you read that.
  • guest01 splattered xXSlayorzXx, using an awe-inspiring British Double Entendre.
  • William C. Lambert was recruited by the Germans after his embarrassing discharge. Manfred von Richthofen shot down William C. Lambert, seeing that he was mistaking him for a sucker, using a Double Entendre on June 17, 1915.
  • Werner Voss shot down William C. Lambert after he tried to insurrect and Double Entendre the Red Baron again. The Allies forces begged Germany's forgiveness, saying "We would never want that fucking douchebag back. He's your problem, fuckers.".