Hector's House
Hector's House was a French-made children's programme about the adventures of a dog, a cat and a frog in a garden. It is considered to be the filthiest television show made for kids in the 1960s and 1970s. Where as the other French television series for children The Magic Roundabout was a five minute advert for the joys of drug use, Hector's House was broadly based on Lady Chatterley's Lover.
Background[edit]
Hector is a dull witted hound who seems unaware that his 'house' is actually a garden. We never see inside his abode which he apparently shares with a female white cat called ZsaZsa (as in Zsa Zsa Gabor). Actually for reasons to avoid getting sued by the Hungarian-Hollywood actress, this was changed to Zouzou when the show appeared in France. Zsa Zsa Gabor apparently was unaware this series was seen in the United Kingdom so didn't threaten to sue there.
So Hector (called Toutou or 'Doggy Style', French slang for bestiality when broadcasted in France) spends all his time digging up vegetables and hiding bones. The only other person who knows Hector is a serial killer is his next door neighour Kiki the Frog. She wears a red gingham dress and a hat. Kiki's garden has no external gate so she spends a lot of her time peeking in by climing a ladder for a good leer and predicting the weather. In later episodes Kiki has dug a hole in Hector's garden but the dozy hound doesn't seem to be aware of its existance. Kiki is undoubtedly a 'Peeking Kinky', hoping to catch Hector and ZsaZsa in the flowerbed, in flagrante amongst the rude vegetable growing patch.
Hector appears unaware that he has become a lust object. When not digging he spends a lot of time in the tool shed 'sharpening his gardening implements'. The actual relationship between Hector and ZsaZsa is only hinted at. As they are unable to go inside the house where ZsaZsa's unseen tomcat husband lives, Hector and ZsaZsa have to retreat to the shed on a regular basis.
Innuendo[edit]
A misunderstanding with the translation from French into English was that Hector's House was a reference to the Trojan War. Later on it was then realised that Hector was actually Mellors the gigolo gardener.
Here are some of the shows broadcast with their official name and the actual content:
- Good Morning Frog (Episode 2)
- Kiki the Frog is introduced as the amphibian with an extendable ladder. Her gingham dress indicates she is a local sex worker.
- The Thistle (Episode 3)
- Hector discovers he is part Scottish. Orders a kilt via a dodgy mail order company.
- Fishing (Episode 7)
- ZsaZsa the cat mishears that Kiki is a Lesbian.
- Naughty Dog (Episode 15)
- Hector craps in the garden. Asks ZsaZsa to cover it up before Kiki comes over the wall again.
- Hector is too Late (Episode 73)
- Hector wants to wear Kiki's dress to spice up his relationship with ZsaZsa.
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After that shows with titles like Hector thinks Hard and The Tunnel reveals Hector's House was going all the way down a Parisian sewer before thankfully the show was pulled once parents wised up what their children were watching.
No Revivals[edit]
The show was eventually stopped in France when the actors involved went on strike for more money. The puppets were destroyed and the sets thrown into a rubbish bin. Attempts to revive the show failed. This compares to the return of The Magic Roundabout in the 1990s. Once again drug taking trumps sexual content.