Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Interview with a Vampire

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Interview with a Vampire[edit]

Bit British-ish Sog1970 12:52, July 12, 2010 (UTC)

I'm British. Under-User's on people's asses to do some reviews. I'll do it. Give me roughly 15,984 hours. --Matfen 21:05, July 19, 2010 (UTC)

Humour: 8.75 Sorry if this reviews not that helpful, or could be considered short, without giving pointed advice. Whatever. Anyway, I enjoyed this very much on a personal level. I share your apparent disdain for jobcentre workers and the public sector in general, and a lot in it reminded me of the futility of these forced visits.

Screw it, I'm bullet pointing the good things:

  • Interesting play on the concept. Who would have thought of "Job-Seekers Interview With A Vampire". Just a normal Job Interview with a Vampire would have been inspired, although probably quite limited depending on what he was applying for.
  • Using the original nosferatu Max Schrek version.
  • Jeremy Kyle = Staple of Unemployment
  • Attempting to force him to go on Mickey-Mouse courses made me lol. And their ridiculous focus on equality, ignoring that an employer will see from the interview that he is quite clearly old.
  • Taking the piss out of Twilight never gets old, especially when its not specifically named as well.

The only few bad things I can see are a few continuity or factual errors. You've probably noticed some yourself, and just decided to ignore them for better comedy, but I'll list them anyway for you.

  • How long has this dude been unemployed? First it says he's attending his six monthly Restart interview. Then Mrs Feltch says it's his 13 week interview stage interview. Finally, he says he was just working the day before. Not sure if this was just a part-time job, or very temporary putting his claim on hold rather than them closing it.
  • Job Centres typically are only open till about 6pm. He must have got there in Daylight. Perhaps he took the sewer? Perhaps he's pissed off that they'll give someone who lives in desolate area of Yorkshire a postal signing, but not him, who's allergic to sunlight. Perhaps it could be noted that he's unwilling to use Public Transportation? Just spouting half-baked ideas here. Feel free to ignore.
  • Job Centre Workers are reluctant to tell you the date when you sign, never mind fetch you a glass of Perrier water. But a good joke is wrought from this slight contrivance.
  • Not entirely sure, but I thought being on Disabilty Benefit excluded you from JSA. Although lately the govt. is becoming notorious for rejecting and chasing people off Disabilty and telling them they should be on JSA, so perhaps he could moan that he tried to apply for JSA, but the Govt. told him he should just take an umbrella or wear suncream or something.
Concept: 9 See Above.
Prose and formatting: 8.5 Pretty good. I cleaned up the few mistakes I could see. Dumb JSA Advisor tone is spot on, with attention to detail for her irreverance to whatever he says. The Vampire's tone is mostly good, but there are times where I feel it could be a little better. If you've haven't already, I would find a copy of Dracula, or read some of his quotes on the internet, to pen down some of his phrases or more complex wordings. From what I've read, it could equally be a slightly morbid Romanian. It's only his last outburst that truly shows some of his character as a diabolical master of evil.
Images: 9 The second and last picture made me laugh out loud with their captions. The Morning Person one looks more like he's doing the National Anthem to Romania or something though. And Perhaps a photo shop of an office worker with garlic hanging around the neck would be more realistic for a job centre worker. If you were stuck for a caption on the first one, you might like "Entering the crypt of Job Centre Plus", or even just "Entering the Leeds' Job Centre Plus". Is still fine without though.
Miscellaneous: 8.8 Averaged using blood in your urine.
Final Score: 44.05 I'd vote for. I'd even nominate if you notify me when you're happy with it.
Reviewer: --Matfen 22:51, July 19, 2010 (UTC)