Public Forum Debate

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Public Forum Debate was developed for the NFL (Nigerian Fellowship of Lesbians) to serve the purpose of giving Lincoln-Douglas Debaters and Policy Debaters an excuse to smoke weed and walk into a room to see how much random shit they can spit out of their ass in 29 minutes. It is more commonly known as Ted Turner Debate or Corporate Whore Debate.

Judging Criteria[edit]

In order to judge Public Forum Debate, an individual must meet certain prerequisites. They must first of all have to be able to entertain themselves with picking at their cuticles as well as arm hairs for extensive periods of time. Also, they must score below the average stick of butter on a comprehensive IQ test taken from a Barney Coloring Book. In addition to this they must also have a doctor's signature declaring them mentally unstable.

An ideal judge for this forum of debate may come from any of the following:

(Note: An ability to hear is optional, because regardless of what these guys say, always vote for the one with the hottest bitch )

Do not judge middle schoolers doing public forum. Any attempt to do so will eliminate whatever IQ points you have left and leave you in a vegetative state for the rest of your life.

Format of Public Forum Debate[edit]

Public Forum Debate is a very simple debate to follow, sometimes so simple that people have been known to lose I.Q. Points just by watching. Because the topic is typically about the most random ass thing-like the dress code for the mutherfuckin NBA -- who gives a shit? -- two parking lot security guards in Toledo could possibly pull out of each others asses, the order can be changed, upon signature of the nearest caffeine addicted dickhead coach.(There has been a recent surplus of these insignificant little fucks, who think that their work actually matters, when in reality all they do is stay in the hotel room naked while eating Fritos and masturbate for a weekend.)

The format is as follows:

  • Pro Constructive-Speaker presents dressed in a bright pink thong, any use of other colors signify a disrespect to the judge, and thus is punishable by obligating the competitor to watch Woody Allen’s new porn flick co-starring Kyle's Mom.
  • Con Constructive-Speaker utters incomprehensible shit about the extent of the gayness of Elton John
  • Cross Fire-Speakers yell at each other until one finally apologizes for cheating on the other. In which case they would stop argumentation and proceed to sodomize each other for a period no longer than 2 minutes.

Current PF Debate Topic[edit]

The United States federal government should remove the Secret Service and implement a system molded after the founding fathers' original plan with ninjas mounted on dinosaurs.