Mindanao State University
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This article may be Overly Filipino. It's Spain's fault. |
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| Mindanao State University | |
| Chosonminhagukgi Chonghap Taehak | |
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| Motto | Death to Punks and Emos! |
| Established | 1961 September 01, 35 Years before the time of Dear Leader |
| School type | Propagandist |
| President | Dr. Macapado Muslim, as of Soria-12(2008) |
| Location | Marawi, Gensan, Iligan, Mindanao |
| Campus | Scattered randomly throughout Mindanao |
| Enrollment | Students: 1 billion |
| Endowment | Based on its rooster, pretty huge. |
| Faculty | Busy reeducating punks and emos |
| Mascot | Celestial Rooster (Sarimanok) |
| Colors |  Gold and Maroon
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| Label | Anti-Emo Commies |
| Postgrad Label | The writer doesn't know what the fuck this means. |
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Mindanao State University System[edit]
MSU-Marawi[edit]
Mindanao State University-Marawi is the largest and the big mother of all MSU schools. This campus is located in Marawi, and serves as HQ for all MSU campuses. It contains one of the most striking feature of Mindanao architecture (as you may see on top of this page), the Admin Building of MSU, which was built under the auspices of the Stalinist Socialist Regime. Note that the red star on top the building's spire has yet to be replaced with a sarimanok, and a huge picture of the MSU seal in front facade is planned to be placed. It also contains the pinnacle of traditional Mindanao architecture, the King Faisal Mosque, which looks like a modern-era mosque in a brilliant hue of blue.
MSU-General Santos City[edit]
This is one of the more sprawling campuses of MSU. Located scenically at the Tambler-Uhaw desert above the Saranggani Bay, the campus is so huge that one get's lost easily here. The main building is frequently mistaken as General Santos City's Airport. The location of the school guarantees the student a nice, scorching tan under the sun, while the dust offers free facial powder and the wind gives a free aroma therapy on Gensan's finest product, courtesy of the canning plants scattered below MSU-GSC. The building's here are somehow named after letters, like building Y, building L and so forth. The campus is protected by 9-11ft walls surmounted by barbed wire and some guard towers, anti-aircraft artillery/surface-to-air missile emplacements and is accessible via the communal jeepney from downtown campus.
The campus is noted for its privacy. One notices the serenity of MSU-GSC while strolling here, as the campus streets are usually deserted save for the habal-habal, the jeepney and sometimes the occasional admin vehicles, which makes the place look like Little P'yongyang. You can also see the your friendly schoolmate cows or goats from the Agriculture College as you look out the window. MSU-GSC's tuition is really cheap, a reflection of the current Communist regime doctrine of quality education for all. The school has numerous courses, most notably provided by the College of Agriculture, Education and Islamic Studies.
MSU-CETD GSC[edit]
MSU-GSC also has a downtown campus located in the heart of the city. This campus is known as the College of Education Training Department, and also hosts the nightly College of Law. The place is no different to that of the Tambler campus, the ground literally bakes under the sun's heat and is mostly submerged like Venice after a torrential downpour. However, the generous MSU-Admin provided a concrete path for safe passage even in a downpour. There is also a covered court being constructed over the basketball court, after the recent graduation got soaked in the rain. There is also a library, and a "proposed library", which is actually an impromptu auditorium in which seminars, orientations, self-criticism sessions, and re-education sessions as well as the Holy Mass is held.
After the Communist takeover, the 2-story main building was demolished in place of a more massive palace-like structure which was to be visible over Gensan. This is one of the massive architectural revolution put in place by the regime. One of the more striking architecture of the city, the new MSU-CETD building hold more that 50 rooms for the High School, 60 rooms for the Law College and an extensive library on the top floors, as well as the Admin offices. The Field is now behind this massive structure.
A Message from the Dear Leader of the Student-Communist Party of Mindanao on the Event of the MSU Centennial[edit]
Fellow comrades in education! We send you fervent greetings, making you serv--er, participate in our exultant jubilation over the brilliant, successful, endless and never-changing perpetual application of what is your centennial under the slogan "MSU: in defense of the communist leadership, against everybody else who is emo or punk!" As well as delivering your ultimate goal of shoving an anchor up the oral and rectal recesses of the vampire midget you call Edward Cullen, it is your principal objective to defend your glorious university that is vital to the Sorian revolution of the Student, and deal demolishing and forceful blows to Emo imperialism! I call upon you to use your blood-stained bludgeons, machetes and AK-47s to crush and painfully grind the balls of your enemies with your iron fists!
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