HowTo:Be productive

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So, you want to be productive, huh? Well, you've come to the right place, bucko. In this tutorial I'll teach your lazy ass how to be productive anywhere, at any time.

The Steps to Productivisticism[edit]

  1. First, you'll want to choose something to be productive in. It can be whatever you want. Preferably something important, like hairdressing, or trying to figure out if Protoman would win in a fight against Batman (He would).
    It helps you concentrate! Now with pulp.
  2. After you're done deciding, you have two options. Take a large dose of Concerta that you stole from a pharmacy, which will focus the hell out of you, or do it the hard way and stop playing that stupid block game with the pickaxes and the weird looking explode-y guys. I mean, you're supposed to be doing work. Seriously, close it out. Y'know what, just go ahead and delete it from your computer. I never want to see it again. Also, remember to drink tons of Hi-C. It's concentrated, and we all know you are what you eat! Or drink. I don't see the difference.
    This is where your forum posts go.
  3. Create multiple forum posts in the Village Dump about what you've accomplished so far, because everybody wants to know. If you want, you can spam people's talk pages, too! We'll get back to you as soon as possible, and nominate you as the best and greatest Uncyclopedian ever.
  4. You're not finished yet. Now you have to take a screenshot of your finished work, and put it on a cultural, inspiring, message board where you will be given tips as to better your already amazing work.
  5. Now, you must submit your work that you gained through being productive to the Smithsonian Museum of Super Amazing stuff. This will make you the most bestest person of all time, and you will become God.

The reason nobody else is God except God is because the Smithsonian has a REALLY long waiting line.


You are now productive! Now get off this site, because it isn't productive.