absolute zero

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absolute zero (plural absolute zeroes or absolute zeros, but not absolute zerii)

  1. (physics) What happens when you kill exactly 273 guys named Kelvin.
  2. (astronomy) The spatial coordinates of the absolute centre of the universe, (0, 0, 0), which is located not within the centre of the Earth, as thought by the ancients, but in Brisbane, Australia - as indicated by the fact that everything in the universe is rushing away from it at great speed.
  3. (mathematics) The only number that is more zero than zero and less like anything else than zero.
  4. (calligraphy) A written elliptical character of axial ratio 1.414 : 1.00 to distinguish it from a capital O whose ratio is 1.337 : 1.00