Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/project
Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/project[edit]
The article has been copied to main space as Science fiction WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 18:10, June 9, 2010 (UTC)
Thank you to whomever reviews Science Fiction. Lots of fine writers worked on it under the guidance and command of Captain James T. Puppy, who got us through Warp 7 unharmed. Thanks again, Captain's Cook and Cabin Boy, Al des chains 15:12 24 5 MMX
- Seeing as how I haven't done anything on the article other than participate in discussions and assemble some possible images, perhaps I could do the review. If there's a problem because of my involvement, post a note here within the time it takes light in a vaccuum to travel 2.59020684 × 1013 meters / 2. If there's no objection, I'll have the review done in the time it would light in a vaccuum to travel an additional 2.59020684 × 1013 meters. (That means if there's no objection from IC within 12 hours, I'll review this within 24 hours after that 12 hour period). WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 19:33, May 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Why? is one of the best reviewers. In the top dozen at least. Thanks for taking it. Al des chains 00:21 25 5 MMX
- And this has absolutely nothing to do with him becoming a Platinum pisser. (On a slightly more serious note, HELPME has also offered to do an independent review, so we will hopefully have two for the price of one!) • Puppy's talk page • 00:40, June 5, 2009 Tuesday, 04:31, May 25 2010 UTC
- Chiefster said I have to do over 50 Pee Reviews, so this one will leave me one short. >:-( Expect a review in the time it would take a Star Fleet starship to travel from Sol to Proxima Centauri if traveling at an astonishing Warp 13.5. WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 16:33, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
- And this has absolutely nothing to do with him becoming a Platinum pisser. (On a slightly more serious note, HELPME has also offered to do an independent review, so we will hopefully have two for the price of one!) • Puppy's talk page • 00:40, June 5, 2009 Tuesday, 04:31, May 25 2010 UTC
- Why? is one of the best reviewers. In the top dozen at least. Thanks for taking it. Al des chains 00:21 25 5 MMX
Introduction to your reviewer
Somehow, I think most of you know me. But I will briefly mention my background in SF. This is my 50th official Pee Review, and about a fourth of my reviews were SF or SF related. I was at Star Trek's 25th anniversary; started an informal club based on The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and wrote for the H2G2 wiki before Wikipedia even existed; used to wake up on Saturday mornings to the music of Doctor Who on the tele; ran SF role-playing games at several conventions; corresponded with Isaac Asimov; was given a paperback book as a present by Ray Bradbury, etc. I think you get the idea. I also want to say that I haven't read any of the IC discussion for a few days and am trying as much as possible to ignore anything I do remember. I want to approach this article as if it just happened to be in the Pee Review queue and I happened to be the one who came along and reviewed it. That's not entirely possible, of course, but I'll do the best I can. | ||
Concept: | 8 | The concept seems to be to cover the highlights of the Science Fiction genre, which I think is a good choice. |
Prose and Formatting: | 5.5 | I put Humour comments in with P & F to avoid repeating myself but do score them separately.
Your intro
Definition
The history of science fiction
Isaac Asimov, the Nerd
Robert Heinlein, the Dean
Ray Bradbury
Kilgore Trout, the Bard
Arthur C. Clarke, the Visionary
Sub genres of science fiction
Ringworld
Soft SF
Bradbury's Influence on Soft Sci-Fi
Brave New World
Cyberpunk
The Matrix Trilogy
Time Travel
Doctor Who
Alternate History
Back to the Future
Apocalyptic Science Fiction
The Bible
Military S.F.
Starship Troopers
Space Opera
Star Trek
Star Wars, Stargate, The Last Starfighter, etc.
The dangers of science fiction
See also
References
Remember that in collaboration, getting an article to sound like it was written by one person is critical--unless it's a rare exception where different people actually address the reader within the article. Collaborations require someone to go through and make all the pieces fit together. |
Humo(u)r: | 4 | Quite honestly, I rather think I'm being a little generous with this score. Some of the parts I found very funny, but the great majority of the article I didn't, as explained above. |
Images: | 6 | This is a mixed score: 7 for images, 5 for captions. I'll deal with each image separately.
Photonic orgasm--rather like the image and caption. The Beyond--SciFi Tribute--nice tribute; not funny. Unless the intent is to take the reader away from the article for six minutes and 52 seconds, I'd cut this out--or at list stick it at the end after the article's over. But really, I'd cut it. Icarus--rather like the photo and caption--except that it references the ending of the article which the rest of the article doesn't. I'd add a hint of the ending to go with this caption--or rewrite the caption to fit this section of the article. Asimov--nice picture, but I found the caption mediocre. Did you see the one of him wearing the Jupiter Two as a hat? Ringword--liked the image (yes, I'm a huge Tolkien fan too); found the caption to be so-so. The Wizard--sorry, I'm rather biased against that wizard image because it reminds me of how a non-article was named one of the best three articles of the month which pissed several people here off. Keep in mind that using this image will likely piss them off at this article. If I ignore the bias, I find the image OK, but don't like the caption. The Matrix--I found the image OK, didn't care for the caption. The Doctor and Amy--because of my limited TV right now, I haven't seen this episode, damnit. The idea of the caption might work if the text that mentions the doctor's (until recently non-existent) sexuality. The car--nice image, but don't care for the caption. Doc Brown's actual quote I found much funnier--don't see why the article couldn't use it. "The way I see it, if you're gonna build a time machine into a car, why not do it with some style?" In my opinion, one of the best non-serious quotes in a SF movie. Apocalypse--nice image, but if there's a joke in the caption I'm not getting it. Flip flops--I'd stamp out the caption and the image. Shatner--often I find moving images in an article to be distracting, unless they work really, really well. This one to me doesn't work really, really well--and I don't find the caption humorous. Data--unfortunately, I've seen this too many times in other articles to find it terribly amusing here. Still, I rather like it and the caption. |
Miscellaneous: | 5 | Overall impression of the article. |
Final Score: | 28.5 | When I read the beginning of this, I anticipated that this article was going to be quite good--I'm talking feature level. But sadly, the great majority of the article didn't live up to what the beginning promised. Quite honestly, I think this article needs a complete rewrite. The writing styles in different sections don't fit with the style in other sections, and I found very little humour. Some parts as I described I thought were very good, but unfortunately I found them few and far between. |
Reviewer: | WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 06:21, May 26, 2010 (UTC) |
Humour: | 6.25 | WARNING: Do not read this review until you are prepared and open to criticism. Some of this is harsh and blunt, even though this isn't all bad. Thanks. Also, if I completely missed the point, feel free to completely disregard my opinion and accept my apologies.
OK, so I'm going to use this for all of my advice that doesn't fall into another section.
That's still like a list, but it's not exactly the same as a list. That would express everything in a better way and won't annoy dumb people like me.
|
Concept: | 6 | Well, there are quite a few concepts. I feel there are a few too many, even for such a long article. I wish you had kept a certain angle. That is to say that you would have a certain joke slant that lasts through every different satire point- a constant opinion, dialect, mindset, etc. I give most of my advice for this in humor. |
Prose and formatting: | 6.5 | There are quite a few mistakes formatting and prose issues:
"genre is know" - Genre is known.
So, yeah. A lot of spelling and grammar problems, but considering the article's size, it's understandable. |
Images: | 7 | First image: Love it. Wouldn't change a thing.
|
Miscellaneous: | 6.5 | Overall feeling |
Final Score: | 32.25 | This isn't all that bad. It just needs some help. Problems include:
Some parts of this are feature quality and some aren't even close. So, at a 32.25, this means that the article is more or less average. Good luck with what you're doing just remember not to mess with the good parts. |
Reviewer: | --On Saturday, 04:27, May 29 2010 UTC |