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A long long time ago in the lands where oil grows,

there was a mysogynistic homophobic bored racist semite.

He wrote a book, I had a look,

It was vile and cruel and the hordes did delight.

But for some reason in these pre christ seasons,

The Believers, Jews, were affably kind

But then a young mother's excuses for chastity abuses

Did a place in the hearts of some idiots find

Now Saul of tarsus, a jew, and a master,

Sold things to the gentiles that didn't apply

But by pleasing the man he Alienated fans

So Jesus was loved only by foreskinned guys

But this wasn't enough for guys near the gulf,

They decided another prophet was needed. And so,

When Mohammed turned up, The young swarthy pups

Did love him and cover their women in Robes.

The Muslims then bombed everyone for millions of years and no-one liked them.

And then everyone became an Atheist. At fucking last.