Talk:Supply-side Jesus

2015 The Article Whisperer--Judging

Humour:	6	The humor is marred by frequent navelism and recourse to sources that the article writer can't pin down. The Intro should be authoritative and hint about a comedy trip about to begin, but it has "little-known...but it has recently come to attention" suggesting that someone isn't clear what the article is about. Section 1 is way too much about writing an Uncyclopedia article and how to balance the treatment of this Jesus with the other one. Then we jump in and it gets better. Section 2 is a fine evil rendition of capitalism with Jesus's life blended in. Section 3 is a workable theory on the "missing years," though now with little tie-in to capitalism. Section 4 is back working again as Section 2 did, though marred by "rather sketchy...unconfirmed rumors....At least, that's what the propaganda system said." — Write crap as though you believed it! and if you don't, invent researchers whose identities will be a joke of their own. Another humor problem is the need for the reader to know who Al Franken is (Is he in this as a comic or as a Senator? Why?); this might not play well outside the U.S.
Concept:	8	The main conceptual flaw, writing about a subject that does not exist, is saved by the fact that we have a Hell of a lot of Jesii, and fortunately several navigational templates allowing them to all be found; also that it is not just "Capitalist Jesus" (which is what we call capitalists) but "Supply-side," which is what they call themselves; truly steeped in capitalism. The central concept, taking a character known for holiness and merging Him with a creed not known for it, is fun and is followed faithfully. The article does a good job of keying off aspects of both real-life things — the Bible citations help the cover.
Prose and formatting:	9	The prose is fine and there are no gaping errors. There are a few red-links. You need to press Enter after any [[File:...]] or the surrounding paragraph won't render correctly. The See Also is obviated by the nav-template just below, and the "Oh yeah, I almost forgot" there is another dollop of navelism that detracts from the "encyclopedia" cover.
Images:	9	The shoops are fine and relevant. The "poster" one is too busy with text for my taste. Text should be text; that lets you edit it and might even let someone on a French wiki translate it easier. You ought not have two photos in the Intro, and the one on the left begs for another section on His life in carpentry.
Miscellaneous:	5	There is far too little of the article! Even on my small (portrait-mode) screen, the sections are small and overwhelmed by the photo paired with them; it would be worse on a screen that had 1024px horizontal. The structure is a big photo and a single idea, repeated four times. You need not slog through the entire life of Jesus, but it would be fun to flesh out these ideas more deeply, picking and choosing from the stuff in real life.
Final Score:	37	There is only one contestant in the category. You win.
Reviewer:	Spıke Ѧ 04:16 11-Jan-15 04:16, January 11, 2015 (UTC)

I am not sure if you were aware, that the article idea indeed came from UN:WANTED. It is #880, and has 18 red links to it (yes, I was digging that deep into the list). It came from a dead article, and so the title itself is not original. Al Franken wrote (and maybe didn't draw) a short comic strip called, I think "The Gospel of Supply-Side Jesus", whom I read years ago from a book I owned and based the concept upon. It is enough of a classic that I am sure you can Google it. I believed this was famous enough that I would have thought that the writers of the original "dead" Uncyclopedia article (or the articles with the dead links) must have had Franken in mind when they first authored it. Franken definitely deserves mention as a scribe or a Gospel writer or something like that. I just took it in a different direction, and tried not to write it as a Gospel, nor as an attack on the Republican Party (which I think is what Franken intended). The "murkiness" of some information was intended to be a take-off on the murkiness of the biography of the actual Jesus of Nazareth. But I understand your intent with that criticism. When you re-enable the article for editing I can make such changes, hopefully without reducing the article to another Gospel. Phrank Psinatra (Talk) 10:35, January 13, 2015 (UTC)

Thanks for the clarification. However, murky writing as an inside joke is sometimes just murky writing. I'll let Anton199 (who has not even asked me to lock the other categories — there are stragglers by permission) set the timetable for unlocking. Spıke Ѧ 13:15 13-Jan-15