Talk:Carry On Film
I'm buggered if I can work out how to do it, but can anyone capitalise the title for me as it would look a bit neater. --OliverKnight 08:43, 18 November 2007 (UTC)
Disambiguation[edit]
I'm going to suggest moving this page to Carry On Film (movie), and put a disambiguation bit at the top of Carry On Films, in order to avoid confusion. That is, if this thing avoids deletion. At the moment, it looks bleak. Give it some love, my man! And let me know if I should do the move/disambig for yah. EugeneKay wuz here (whine thank) 06:43, 19 November 2007 (UTC)
Okay, if you think this will help. Please go ahead. Many thanks for helping. And thanks for your kind appraisal, too. But please feel free to help me make it less bleak. I await your suggestions. I look forward to returning the gesture for your articles some time. --OliverKnight 18:10, 19 November 2007 (UTC)
Oh. I see you haven't actually created any articles. My bad. Sorry. --OliverKnight 07:58, 9 December 2007 (UTC)
Carry On Film[edit]
Hello, please review this article and I will express my gratitude via the medium of Morris Dancing.--OliverKnight 19:19, 7 December 2007 (UTC)
Humour: | 7 | Quite funny, but not what I would call laugh out loud funny. It's more "clever" rather than rolling around laughing funny... I like the idea of "Sid James" (played by Sid james) etc that's good., RE the Barbara Windsor name thing... Did the royal family not change their name to Windsor during the war to distance themselves from their German past? Not sure if you can use that, maybe that was the intention and I missed it...
Surely we need a reference to Confessions of a Window Cleaner or Confessions of a Driving Instructor there are a few of em in the series, and they are along the same lines. How about making up silly names for some of the other carry on films? Carry on up the passage (up the carry on up the khyber), filmed in a toilet... Carry On Cruising filmed in a gay bar? Carry On Spaceman filmed where everyone was stoned? Any other references to British sex farce would be good. I can't think of many more cos, well, I would never watch that sort of thing... (honest) I'm Free??? Maybe Mr Peecock should make an entrance? I think you can have some fun here by mixing up a few made up names with some genuine ones, this could work well in that people not familiar with the genre would know know which were real, and which were made up. How about a range of self inflating head rests sponsored by Miss Windsor? |
Concept: | 8 | It's basically a good idea, but not what I would call super super original. There is some room for expansion here and there perhaps if you branch out into other films perhaps. |
Prose and formatting: | 7 | I think the general writing style is good, and fits well with the material. It does get rather list like later on... The trivia section could benefit from being made into bullet points maybe rather than a plain list, and maybe the other one as well. I'm not actually sure that using lists like this is a good idea at all... Perhaps expand them into full sentences?
I also think it's a bit short of links. Considering that the whole carry on series was based on puns, I think that almost all of your links should be slapstick style puns which do not link to the actual thing, but subtle sexual references etc... If you choose to do this with the links I think it would add a new dimension to the article. I'm going to slaughter you for the pictures in the next section... |
Images: | 0 | Um, OK. I'm being harsh on you here, but what else can I score ya? You don't have any pictures at all! Come on, there must be some good ones out there! Anything which allows you to use a little bit of double entendre in the caption has to be good. You don't even have a picture of Barbara Windsor tits! COME ON MAN! |
Miscellaneous: | 7.3 | Averaged. (I took pity on you and did not average the images score into it) |
Final Score: | 29.3 | Generally, I enjoyed reading this. It's got a few clever ideas in it but is just a little bit short on really great jokes. Considering the subject matter I don't think your giving it the justice it deserves. As your aware I expect only us Brits are really going to appreciate this, so anything which you could do to make it more accessible to them over there has got to be a good idea.
Maybe it also needs to be a bit longer, and defiantly tidied up here and there and ADD SOME PICTURES!!!... |
Reviewer: | MrN Fork you! 12:57, Dec 10 |
Humour: | 7 | Some good double entendres, but I think you really have to turn the innuendo right up to make this laugh-out loud funny. The more double entendres the better, providing the sentences still make sense of course. For example "Carry On Film was a huge failure at the box office and was even withdrawn from some cinemas halfway through its very first showing" could become "Carry On Film was a huge flop at the box office and was even prematurely withdrawn from some cinemas halfway through its first performance.
The reception section could do with some expanding. I also think you can add a few more pieces of merchandise to that section. To me, a pop-up book is an obvious choice. |
Concept: | 8 | It's a simple idea, but it works. |
Prose and formatting: | 8 | I couldn't spot any spelling or grammar mistakes. There's a bit of a run on sentence at the start. I'm not sure how "...and featuring characters with double-entendre names" relates to the earlier part of the sentence.
Stylistically, I would prefer it if you avoided obvious words like "sex" or "anus". The Carry Ons would use less direct terms like "rogering", "a bit of hanky-panky" or "back passage". You should do all you can to reflect the style of the movies. |
Images: | 9 | I like the pics. They're all well chosen, especially the one with Jim Dale on a trolley. I think the first one should be a bit bigger, though. |
Miscellaneous: | 6 | I think the bit about Rock Hudson and the Bollywood director should have its own section, so the introduction is just that.
Where did Bruce Forsyth and Stephen Fry come from? Authenticity is important here, as people who read the article will be familiar with the series and expect to recognise the actors as Carry On alumni. People like Bob Monkhouse, June Whitfield and Leslie Phillips could all be mentioned instead. Finally, I'd prefer it if you could integrate the quotes at the end into the article, either by inserting them into the main text or using a quote to introduce a section (in particular the Kenneth Williams one could introduce the reception section). |
Final Score: | 38 | I liked the article overall and there is a lot of good stuff. It just needs that little bit of polishing. |
Reviewer: | -- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey) 14:09, 14 December 2007 (UTC) |