New Australia
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| Motto: "We're here, we're queer! Get used to it!" | |||||
| National Anthem: God Save the King by the Sex Pistols | |||||
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| Established by Gay Aboriginals | circa 38,000BC | ||||
| Established by Gays | 900BC | ||||
| Independence | 1350AD | ||||
| Government | Anarchy | ||||
| President | 500 Dildos | ||||
| Official language | Some Gay Shit, Math, Japanese, aboriginal languages, Pig Latin and Chinese | ||||
| Currency | Yen (Japanese yen used until a new currency, also called Yen, was made) | ||||
| Religion | Homosexuality | ||||
| National Heroes | Kevin Rudd, John Brumby,Jimmy Wales | ||||
| Capital | Echuca | ||||
| Gay Capital | Mill-dura | ||||
| Most Backwater City | Swan Hill | ||||
| Exports | Food, Cars, Koreans, etc. | ||||
| Imports | Food, Cars, Gays, Water, etc. (can't be bothered) | ||||
| National Crisis | Civil War, Discrimination towards Homosexuals. | ||||
“This place is where i can fuck my boyfriend Jimmy Wales”
New Australia. Here is the article for it.
New Australia
Only read this part if you're Australian. If you're not, skip to the History part
New Australia (not to be confused with Victoria), commonly mispronounced as the Booty Islands is a huge illegal and uncalled piece of the Australian continent. They are governed by a ungoverning faggot known as 500 Dildos, distantly unrelated to the ethnicity of gay people despite running a gay country.
New Australians like to associate themselves with Victoria, though the latter on the contrary go hunting for New Australians in summer. Cold people live in New Australia because it's hot there, at least in some places. Some of these cold people look suspiciously like kangaroos.
Despite the high concentration of the aforementioned cold people, nobody willingly moves to New Australia, unless they happen to be obscure Russian nationals or Bears who are answering a call of nature to lay their eggs there. Tasmanian people and Queenslanders move there only because they are prohibited by law to form the 6th level of vertical human habitat, and to lay their eggs there. This is why New Australia is also known as The Gay-land. Athiests used to make up New Australia's ninja army, but have since moved away to China, depending on how smart or hungry they were.
Cold New Australians speak the cold Australian accent, which has enabled them to create such pieces of hell as E.T and Superman 64.
New Australia was drastically changed upon the announcement of the Islamic Mosque's acknowledgement of the existence of little dots. It also experienced another paradigm shift when the people realised that New Australia, big as it is, was not a country and that Central Australia really doesn't exist.
History of New Australia
New Australia (commonly known more as "Poo! Australia!") was proclaimed by 30-year old Australian Hippies in 1955. They then built a big signpost commonly known as Helyou!. When you see this signpost, you know you're in the very middle of New Australia.
Before the invention of the letters 'N', 'E', or 'W", New Australia was known as Australia. Australia (then known as New Australia) then attacked Australia and forced the nation to add the New part to the original (or new) country.
Actually, New Australia had been founded much earlier than they proclaimed it, though, and that was a bitter surprise, one morning, for the hung-over Hippies. They paid a terrible price for their bad knowledge of English accents. By 1957 all Hippies had perished in a food crisis due to Skinny Emus.
Nevertheless, in 1963 the great army of Perth had released the New Australians from the firm grip of their Emu Tyranical Overlords. New Australian liked the control of Perthers because they gave work to all poor New Australian people. New Australians were building houses, working at McDonald's, cleaning toilets in all areas of the vast Perth State (which was a great job as, in fact, you cleaned the toilets), and occasionally teaching Australian Hippies (for some had survived after all) how to speak a slightly better English accent than usual.
From 1964 and onwards, New Australia was a little city of the Perth State, and both were prospering. A pathetic province of Adelady, consisting or war-hungry beasts and soccer fans, were extremely envious of the New Australians, and called them "Pesky Homosexuals", "Tyranic Fools" or "Heieiei" as the Soccer fans called it. But then in 1968, somebody learnt Adeladian by accident; and very soon there were Perther-owned police on the streets of Adelady's capital site, Ade-Abadoo. Later on Adelady was planning some revenge. However facts clearly show that it was absolutely unnecesary.
In 1972, Kevin Rudd was killed by 500 Dildos during a prime-time coverage election which was hosted by <insert name here>,Chris Hansen and Your Mom that was aired on Channel 9. This is how 500 Dildos has still been leading New Australia since.
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Places to see
The Murray River
Well, there is almost nothing in it. Go upstream and there is some water. But you can swim in that crap. I don't want to hear complaints that you got halitosis, m'kay?
Murray Beach
Home to transvestites, transsexuals and lesbians, this is where sexy lesbos, transvestites and transsexuals hang out every day and night for exercise and showing off.
The Pink Triangle
Yes, it's in Sydney, but that is partly funded and maintained by the New Australian Government that loves homosexuals. Built in memory of the homosexuals that died for us.
The Rainbow Flagpole
This one has a Rainbow Flag on it. A tall pole indeed. By night, it becomes a huge pole-dancing pole, where gays pole-dance to entertain sods.