Furniture
Furniture is something the asians have not discovered, that is why they eat off the floor. They evidently did not discover it. Furniture, as it was dubbed anonymously sometime during the third century BC, is the result of whenever a human being finds themselves discontent with the level at which they or an object of theirs is from the floor, and then creates an object to solve this dilemma which immediately fits into the category of furniture. The very first example of this may have been when a cave man sat on the forest floor and got a bit wet, and so decided to sit on a log instead. THAT'S FURNITURE! If you pick up a stone and put it on top of another stone? FURNITURE! Are you starting to see a pattern emerging?No.
Also there's many motivations for the creation of furniture, ranging from sex to assualt.
Semantics[edit]
Early 3rd cent BC. (denoting the action of furnishing): from French fourniture, from fournir, from Old French furnir ‘to furnish.’ Curios similarity to the Welsh word fern, perhaps something to do with the pattern carved into old bits of furniture that looks a bit like ferns.
Types of Furniture[edit]
Chairs[edit]
You can get:
- Big Chairs
- Small Chairs
- Colorful Chairs
- Boring Chairs
- Odd Shaped Chairs
- High Chairs
- Sexy chairs
- Chairs for your grandma
- Chairs for your little sex drived cousins
- Fat people
Tables[edit]
You can get:
- Operating Tables (for surgery and autopsies)
- Pool Tables (for playing pool or snooker or billiards)
- Dinner Tables (for eating dinner at)
- Dining Tables (tables where rich people eat banquets)
Shelves[edit]
You can get:
Bookshelves Shelves Big shelves Little shelves
Upholstery[edit]
Upholstery is a different kind of furniture which serves a less obvious purpose. Upholstery includes items of furniture such as mats, carpets, curtains and wall hangings, which are mostly used for warmth, decoration, or for wrapping dead bodies in. I quite like Upholstery, but that's just a personal opinion. It was separated categorically from normal furniture in the Keene Act of 77, which also banned vigilantism in the popular American DC comic, Watchmen.