French accent

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“Dont Do that”

~ Doctor Who on fake french accents

Ze Frènch accent iz more tin a way of taulking to paepawl around ze world, eet iz ze languidge of ze classics, and et iz ze languidge of luv. Ze grreat Willae aun Whaels uzez a frènch accent tou fooul ze Wikipaedia saerveurz. It haz biine conntreauvaercial how baud ze grreat Willae aun Whaels iz.

Prahktize your frènch accent éverie déiylle bi lerhning a nu werd everree dei. Befoor yu no-ez, yu weehl bee a goo-d speeker and moor emportantlee, you weehl bee 'hable to imprezz zee ladieez, no? In ui ITVt

Famoose peeples who hav spokeen ze English weet a frènch accent[edit]

Manee famoose peeples hav spokeen weet frènch accents, and dey r, ow do you say, veree mooch in ze deman for ze patrees and for zeir out-looks on zi life.

  • Maurice Chevalier- You say dat you ave neveer eard of ze grate Chevalier? Mon du! Ee was simplee ze greatest singing French Film Star in ze entire whirld!
  • Louis Jourdan- Most peeple oooh do not know inny betor would pronounce eez first name as ze flat L-O-U-I-S, but Eee reallee pronounce eet Looie. And ze last name is not J-O-R-D-A-N lick the countree, boot SHOR-dan.
  • Jerry Lewis - An Engleez speaker would sey, "fa-fa-fa!", but we say eet as SHEE-rry Lew-ESS! And Shee-rry Lew-ESS is greatest comedianne of all time, past, prezent or furtaire!
  • Bridget Bardot - Ze engliz speaker say "Ho-ho-ho! Bridget Bardoe" but wee just call Er BeBe.
  • Zee guy on ze stella artroz four advert
  • Ze John Cleese "Ah fart een your jeneral direcsion!"

Sex of the word[edit]

If ooow want to speak with zee French accent, un, you must learn to insert ee sex of each word into wauiat u say. So let us asooom dat you are talking about ze o-tomobeel. Ze o-tomobeel, she is a woman. Ze o-tomobeel is sexy, no? So you would sea dat "She eezz my new automobile - she eez a Panhard LeVoisee-a." Now you try eet. Bon!

Now we try for a masculine non - a belt like u would se were around yer waste. So you would sea "My neu belt, Eee ez made of leather!" No you try eet. Bon!

Holy Madre! Wee are ooout of time![edit]

Ô, sacreubleu.! Oui oui! Eet iz alsso necessarie to youze ze accèns marques to furzeur confoun ze serveur et les garçons..Et bien, in ze words of ze immortal Capitain Haddock « Milles millions de milles sabords ! »

Doe you spaeak toe meutch Frènch? Viz iz a goude accent to spiik. Uncyclopaedia haz ruled ze Intaernet. Eat zome cheaazz at ze cafe!

Oh reuvwar. Youe pees of cheet.

See also Vwar Ohsee[edit]